He had already forgotten herpresence, forgotten her words. Well, that was what she wished, wasn't it? Hegave her silence and peace and then closed her away from him. Yet, for somereason, today this isolation bothered her.
She paused at the door as athought occurred to her. "You've never done one of me, have you?"
"What?"
"You're making a bust ofLi Sung without his knowledge. How do I know you haven't modeled one of me aswell?"
"You're wondering if Ihave your likeness secreted away among my treasures?" He shook his head."No, madam."
She felt an absurd rush ofrelief. "I wouldn't put it past you. No one is safe when your art isweighed in the balance."
"True." He liftedhis head. "But I've never made a bust of you."
"Why not?" she askedcuriously.
"I would not dare."
She started to laugh and thenstopped, suddenly breathless and unsure as she met his gaze.
Then he looked down andresumed kneading the clay. He said lightly, "Even I tremble before thelaird's lady's righteous wrath."
A tumult of confused emotionsstreamed through her, relief and disappointment foremost. For a moment she hadfelt as if she had been about to discover some great and mysterious truth aboutKartauk and then been cheated of the knowledge. What did she really know abouthim? He never spoke of his past, never asked for help except as it pertained tohis art, and let no one see beyond that bold, flamboyant exterior. During theseyears she had taken much from him and given nothing in return. Perhaps he hadnot been joking when he had said he had needs of the spirit that had to be met."I did not tell the truth," she said haltingly. "You would bemissed if you left Glenclaren."
He stopped in midmotion butdid not look at her. "By Ian?"
"Yes." She moistenedher lips before she said awkwardly, "And by me. I believe you kinder thanyou pretend."
"Do you?" He glancedup and a flashing smile lit his face. "But I do not pretend. Don't judgeme by your standards. I'm a ruthless heathen, remember?"
She nodded. "How could Iforget?"
"And now a heartlesswomanizer."
The rogue was baiting her. Whythe devil was she worrying about the sensitivity of his blasted feelings?"That you most certainly are. From now on when you strike one of thosesluts with your divine fire, make sure you stay to put out the blazeyourself."
She heard his roar of laughteras she stalked out of the stable.
Li Sung knocked on the door ofJane's cottage only moments after she arrived back at the mill site.
"What's wrong?" heasked when he saw her face as she opened the door. "Ian?"
Blast it, she had known LiSung would notice her discomposure and that was the reason she had gone to thecottage instead of directly to the mill. She shook her head. "He's noworse." She saw the envelope in his hand. "For me?"
"It came right after youleft. I thought you would want to see it right away." He handed her theenvelope. "It's from Lancashire."
Hope leapt as she eagerly toreopen the letter. Dear heaven, let the answer be yes. She needed good newstoday. Bitter disappointment flooded through her as she scanned the brief note.
"Another refusal?"Li Sung's gaze was on her face.
"Yes." She foldedthe letter and stuffed the letter back in the envelope. "It seems myservices aren't needed by the Lancashire railroad."
"That's all theysaid?"
"Oh no." She smiledcrookedly. "Mr. Radkins suggests I occupy myself in more genteel pursuitsand forget this foolishness of trying to involve myself in masculineendeavors."
"He is the fool," LiSung said.
"Well, it appears theworld is full of fools. This is the fifth refusal I've received in the last sixmonths." She tossed the envelope on the table. The rejection was a blowshe hadn't needed when she was already feeling this sense of panic anduncertainty. "I suppose I should have expected it. The most incompetent ofmen are perceived as better than a woman."
