"For God's sake, I'd onlyhold you. I'm not fool enough to think you're well enough to—" He brokeoff. "It would be a start."
She couldn't let it start."No." She could feel his gaze on her back. She had been so relievedwhen she had thought herself free of him. Let him not say anything more. Lethim not touch her.
With relief she heard him movetoward his own bedroll and settle into the blankets. The silence was unbrokenfor several moments. Then he said in a low voice, "Think about it, Jane.If you're honest with yourself, you'll admit you don't have any choiceeither."
Her eyes were suddenlystinging with unshed tears. He had mentioned need and lust but not love. Notthat she wanted him to love her, she told herself quickly. She knew that was asimpossible for him as it was for her now. She was tired and not completely overher illness or she would not feel this sense of desolate loneliness andisolation. She would get over it. She mustn't answer him or let him come anycloser.
She hoped he was wrong abouther not having a choice. Of course he was wrong. He had to be wrong.
Chapter18
They did not overtake Li Sunguntil late afternoon of the next day.
"Li Sung!"
Li Sung stiffened at Ruel'shail and then turned to confront them. The relief Jane felt immediately turnedto concern. Li Sung's usually golden skin was parchment-pale, his mouth set inlines of strain, and his expression distinctly forbidding.
"You should not behere," he said.
"Neither shouldyou," she said. "Are you ill? You look terrible."
"So do you." Li Sungsmiled faintly. "And you are the one who has been ill. I have merely beenenduring the usual agonies inflicted when riding on this equine beast for toolong."
Even a half-day's ride waspainful to Li Sung, and he had been driving himself unmercifully for threedays. She hid the pity the thought brought and said lightly, "It servesyou right for going after the elephant without me."
He grimaced. "I did nottrust you not to soften when I caught up with him. Your heart is too tender. Iwant to shoot him, not adopt him."
"You shouldn't haveworried. He's not a dog or a cat, and he destroyed my tracks," Jane said."Do you have any idea how far ahead he is?"
"Not far."
"How do you know?"Ruel asked. "Have you heard him?"
"No."
"Then how do youknow?" Ruel persisted. "He could be angling back toward the crossingby another route."
"He is not." Hegestured impatiently as Ruel opened his lips. "And I do not know why I amsure, but I am. I tell you, he is just ahead."
"I'm not arguing. I havea firm belief in instinct," Ruel said quietly. "If he's just ahead,then you won't mind stopping for the night. This clearing seems to be as good aplace as any. We can fetch water from that pond we passed a quarter of a mileback."
Li Sung frowned. "It isstill early. If I keep on the trail, I might be able to overtake him."
"And you might not."Ruel got off his horse. "And even if we do catch up with him, we might betoo tired to be any threat."
Li Sung stiffened. "I amweary, not helpless."
"I wasn't talking aboutyou." Ruel reached up and plucked Jane from the saddle. "Jane's beenill, remember?" He met her gaze warningly as she started to protest."You may be able to drive yourself without collapsing, but you might thinkof someone else besides yourself."
"She should not havecome."
"We're here," Ruelsaid flatly. "Deal with it."
Li Sung hesitated beforenodding reluctantly. "Very well." He got off his horse and then hadto grab the pommel of the saddle to steady himself as his stiffened legsthreatened to give way.
Jane hastily averted her eyesfrom this betraying sign of weakness. "I'll gather the wood."
"I'll do it." LiSung released the saddle. "Danor has left more than enough torn up trees inhis wake to accommodate our needs." He limped toward the path left by theelephant.
