“You always think everything is going to be fine. We’ve been lucky we’ve had these years. At least, I’ve been lucky. I’ve liked being here at the abbey.” Juliette looked down at the paint-smeared hands folded on her lap. “When I first arrived I thought I’d hate it. All the rules and the kneeling and the scraping.”
Catherine chuckled. “You break nearly every rule, and most of your kneeling and scraping is done only when you’re caught.”
Juliette wasn’t listening. “And then I tried to find the ugliness in the sisters, but I found there wasn’t any. They’re…good. Even Sister Mathilde doesn’t realize she dislikes me. She thinks she’s punishing me only for the good of my immortal soul.”
“Perhaps she does like you. She’s often cross with me too.”
Juliette shook her head. “She’s younger and more clever than the other nuns. She can see how selfish I am.”
Catherine felt helpless. Juliette, who never needed anything, needed something from her now, but she didn’t have the least notion what it might be.
Juliette chuckled. “I see you give me no argument.”
“You can be wondrously kind when it pleases you. But at times you are so involved with your painting that you forget the needs of others.”
“And you think too much of the needs of others. It’s a dangerous practice. It’s much safer to close everyone out and live only for yourself.”
“You don’t close me out.”
“I probably would if I could. You won’t let me.” The fingers threaded together on Juliette’s lap suddenly contracted. “I closedherout.”
“Her?”
“The queen,” Juliette whispered. “I closed her out and refused to think about her. I was never happy anywhere before I came to the abbey. Don’t I have the right to be happy? I want to stay here with the sisters and paint wonderful pictures and tease you when you become too odiously prim and proper. I don’t want to have to leave here and go to help her.”
“The Reverend Mother said the National Assembly put the queen and the rest of the royal family in the Temple for their protection.”
“That’s what they said when they forced them to leave Versailles for the Tuileries. But that was to go to another palace, not to a prison. The tower of the Temple is so gloomy, so grim.”
“You couldn’t do anything to help her, even if you did leave the abbey.” Catherine added, “And they may not be quite as comfortable in the tower, but I’m certain they’re in no danger.”
“I may be selfish, but I’ll not lie to myself.”
“But the Reverend Mother said no one would hurt—”
“I don’t want to talk about it. I’ve already decided I won’t leave here until Jean Marc takes you away.” Her gaze returned to the rose-pink stone walls of the abbey and some of the tension left her face. “There are silences here. Beautiful silences. I didn’t know anyone could paint a silence until I came here.”
Catherine understood. Some of Juliette’s recentpaintings possessed a tranquility as hushed as the stillness of the chapel at dawn.
“I have a present for you.”
“A present?”
Juliette fumbled in the pocket of her gray gown and handed her a paint-stained, knotted linen handkerchief. “I’ll remember you, but I thought you’d probably need something to remind you of me. You’ll marry your handsome Philippe and have ten children and—”
“You’re speaking foolishly. I haven’t seen Philippe more than three times since I came to the abbey. He thinks of me as a child.”
“You’re an heiress. He’ll change his mind.” Juliette bit her lower lip. “I didn’t mean to say that. You know my unruly tongue. Perhaps your Philippe is as honorable as he is comely. How do I know?”
“You’ll marry too. Most women marry except the nuns.”
“I shall probably never marry. Who would marry me? I’m not at all pretty and I have no dowry.” Juliette lifted her chin defiantly. “Besides, I see no advantage in being a man’s chattel. It seems to me Madame de Pompadour and Madame Du Barry lived much more interesting lives than mere wives would.” She suddenly grinned. “I’ll be no man’s slave. Instead, I shall become a famous painter like Madame Vigée Le Brun. No, much more famous.”
Catherine finally got the knot in the handkerchief undone. “You mean only a quarter of what you say.” She began unfolding the handkerchief. “And you delight in making me—” She broke off as she looked down at the circle of gold on which a single spray of lilac was exquisitely carved. She recognized the necklace immediately. Juliette had only one piece of jewelry, and Catherine had seen it on rare occasions through the years. “I can’t take it. You told me Her Majesty gave this to you for your eighth natal day.”
Juliette’s expression became shuttered. “I’m not sentimental. The queen has forgotten me. It was always my mother she loved and she never gave me a thoughtunless I was underfoot.” She shrugged dismissively, her gaze fixed eagerly on Catherine’s face. “Open it.”
“It’s a locket? I thought it only a necklace. The opening is almost seamless.…” Catherine stopped as the locket sprang open between her fingers. She stared down in disbelief at the painted miniature in the locket. She whispered, “It is I. It is…beautiful.”
