“What does ‘ship’ mean? Aside from a large boat.”
This is how Margie greets me when I walk into the marketing office on Monday morning. I set my stuff down, then walk to her desk, where she has not yet looked up from her phone.
“Um. What’s the context?”
“Your video went live this morning,” she says, still scrolling, and my heart stops. I vaguely remember Aiden saying that it would, but I thought I’d have more time to mentally prepare.
With effort, I tune back in to what Margie is saying. “I check comments occasionally, just to see how people are responding, and there’s a lot of ‘new ship,’ ‘I ship it,’ and so on. What is all that?”
I blink at her and feel the heat rising in my cheeks. Where’s the accidental pistachio face mask when you need it?
“I…Uh. Let me, um, watch it and I—I’ll take a look at the comments after,” I say.
She nods, already distracted by some other task on hercomputer. I walk back to my pseudo desk on shaky legs and open up my laptop. Of course I know what “ship” is, and I have a suspicion as to what’s going on in the comments. But do I have even the faintest interest in explaining that to my boss?
I would rather put a bar of soap in my own mouth, frankly.
Before checking on whatever online horrors await me, I pull my buzzing phone out of my pocket. I’ve felt the texts piling up, and can only hope they might prepare me for the worst of it.
Natalie:OH
Natalie:MY
Natalie:GODDDDDD
Natalie:REESE CAMDEN, FRIEND OF FLAVOR!!!
Clara:wait what’s going on I just woke up
Natalie and Clara are the biggest Friends of Flavor fans I know. Of course Nat’s seen the video already. I put my clammy palm to my forehead. I should’ve told them what was coming over the weekend, but I got distracted by the whole Benny lunch scenario, then a “social platform management” webinar Margie assigned me, and plotting out my path to ultimate intern domination, and, well, the time got away from me.
Natalie has sent five screenshots in rapid succession from what I assume are different parts of the video, but I don’t look too closely.
Clara:…excuse me what
Clara:is that real??
Natalie:YES CLAR I WOULD NOT CREATE FAKE SCREENGRABS OF OUR BFF REESE IN AN ACTUAL REAL LIFE FOF VIDEO ON THEIR REAL LIFE CHANNEL
Clara:ok can you stop yelling
Clara:but R, this is so sick!! tell us more!
Natalie:I WILL NOT BE FORCED TO TEMPER MY EXCITEMENT AT A TIME SUCH AS THIS
Natalie:But my inner voice is getting tired so
Natalie:Reesey, explain yourself stat!!! I’ll just be watching this on repeat till you do
I have not had enough tea to deal with this yet. I reach into my bag with shaking hands and pull out a pair of headphones, discreetly plug them into the laptop, and pull up Friends of Flavor’s page on UltiMedia. Welp, there’s me. Front and center, in a screengrab with the wordsamateur hoursuperimposed under Benny’s and my smiling faces. Faces…that are smiling at each other rather than at the camera.
Er. This isn’t encouraging.
With a quivering hand, I push Play. My heart is pounding and I feel the stress sweats coming on, just from seeing my faceon-screen. I’m really in a video on Friends of Flavor. A video that millions will likely watch, and judge, and comment upon.
Oh my stars. Oh no. Ohhh, what have I done?
The video starts, of course, with Benny’s smooth intro. I notice that as natural as he seems in real life, he comes across even better on-camera. He looks confident and comfortable, talking with his hands in a way that would look like awkward flailing if I did it, but on him is cool.
