“Luke’s right,” Naomi said, and now we were all standing. “We have things to celebrate. Isn’t that what you said? So let’s celebrate.”
Mel looked unsurely at our faces. “This is just ...”
“Not what you planned, I know,” Naomi said. “We’ll make the best of it. I mean, we’d have to anyway. How many stars is this place?” She looked around critically.
Mel’s face broke into the smallest smile, and then she turned back to Ro. “I’m so upset with you.”
“I—just had two drinks, Mom,” Ro slurred.
“Are you actually brainless or just acting like it?” Luke hissed as he steered Rowan toward the waiting area where we’d been sitting.
Mel, Ro, and Naomi had just sat down when our hostess appeared and led us to a table.
I somehow found myself wedged between Naomi and Ro. Luke was on his brother’s other side, and Eric was next to Luke and Mel.
After our drinks arrived, Mel held up her cup to make a toast (she had pointedly ordered a coffee and an extra glass of water for Ro). “Despite the untoward start to this evening,” she said, and we all looked at Rowan, who shifted in his seat, “I want to say that I’m really happy we’re all here. Here tonight, and here at all.”
She swallowed, and I imagined Ro and Luke stiffening the same way I had.
“It’s been a rough couple of months, as you all know. I’m not gonna lie, it sucks being sick. But one thing the Big Bad has taught me is that every day—every moment—counts. I want to spend it as happy and grateful and well-dressed and brave as I possibly can. It’s hard, but you lot make it easier.”
She blew a kiss around the table and took a sip of her water.
I stood up and went around the table to hug her.
“Love you, Jessi-girl,” she said into my hair, and I blinked hard. As I settled back into my seat, I noticed Ro giving me a strange look.
“What?” I asked.
“Why do you look like that?” he asked me.
“Look like what? This is how I always look,” I said, feeling self-conscious as everyone looked over at us. It wasn’t how I always looked. I had curled my hair and was wearing more makeup than I normally did. I’d felt pretty when I looked in the mirror, when Mel had complimented me, and when I’d caught Luke looking at me, but now I felt like the biggest idiot. Like an imposter.
“Rowan, can we not hear from you for the rest of the night?” Mel snapped.
Ro shut his mouth and guzzled down his water.
The rest of the evening was better. The food was delicious (Naomi said she was going to write a review saying their food managed to “overcome their stars”) and I laughed more than I had in ages. Being with the Cohens always made me feel good, and tonight, with the added relief of summer school being over, I was close to giddy.
I kept thinking of Mel’s words from her toast.
I want to spend it as happy and grateful and well-dressed and brave as I possibly can.
I wanted a tattoo of those words somewhere on my body, but I knew I’d settle for scribbling it in my journal tonight, along with all the other Mel-isms and Cohen memories I had.
I was still thinking of it when I stepped out of the restroom after dinner. I’d gotten up while Mel was asking for the bill, and I was absent-mindedly walking back to the dining room when I heard my name.
I spun around to find Luke coming out of the men’s room across the hall.
“Hey,” I said, slowing down so he could catch up with me. After a couple of steps, he stopped walking completely, so I stopped too. “What’s up?”
“I hope you know to ignore him,” he said.
“Ignore who?” I asked.
“Ro.Idiotdoesn’t begin to cover it.”
Ro’s comment about how I looked came rushing back, and with it, all the embarrassment I’d felt.
