“I do. I was thinking maybe some food, or the movies. There’s also this arcade I drove past the other day that could be cool Or maybe bowling—I’m not the best, but it could be fun. Or a picnic even, I’m not the biggest fan of the aviary, but I think if we pick a good spot, the geese might leave us alone.” It all rushes out of him in one breath. His obvious nerves are evident, giving him a boyish quality popping along his usually severe features.
“I just, uh, would like to take you out. On a date. Get to know you,” he adds when I haven’t responded, still staring at him. I’m trying to grasp how a guy who looks likehimwants to takemeout.
I’ve always been told I’m too much. Too angry, too sad, too prickly, too in my head all the time. He could have anyone, and he’s choosingme.
“Okay. Yes,” I say, not fully processing the words as they come out. The answer shocks me but the look on his face keeps me from taking it back. My hands are gripping my straps for dear life, as if they can protect me.
The most dazzling smile takes over his whole face. His straight white teeth are on full display and, oh my god,a dimple. A perfect dimple on his right cheek, blaring at me, making heat flush up my neck and a small smile grace my lips.
“Really? Okay. Cool, yes,” he says excitedly, like he wasn’t expecting that answer. “Do you want to have dinner? I mean, we could make it a picnic dinner?” He takes a step closer to me. I’m unsure how long we’ve been out here, yet I’m in no rush to get to class, content in this space with him.
I release my straps and let my arms and shoulders relax from their tense position. “Yeah. A picnic would be fun.” A smile stretches further across my face as the excitement in his shines back at me.
He steps closer, putting us toe-to-toe in the middle of the hallway. His fingers brush my cheek as he catches a stray lock of my hair and tucks it behind my ear, his hand lingering there for a beat.
I feel the ghost of his touch as his eyes track my face. Staring into his warm brown eyes, I can’t help but think that this might be something life-changing standing in front of me.
“A picnic,” he agrees, his hands dropping to his sides. The hand that pushed my hair back flexes, then he grabs my phone where I hold it between us. After sending a text to himself, he starts to back away from me. He keeps his gaze on me, as if he’s physically incapable of turning away, and a shy smile takes over his face as he traces his bottom lip with his thumb. “I think you, pretty girl, might just be the greatest thing about moving here,” he adds, scanning my body once more before finally turning and taking the hallway to the right.
I stay stuck staring after him long after he’s gone.
CHAPTER EIGHT
avery
NOW
I miss you, I’m sorry – Gracie Abrams
“Honestly whoever said this was a romcom, should really get the book thrown at them,” Morgan moans as we walk out of the theater. She tosses her empty gummy straw wrappers and continues to munch on her extra-large popcorn that her and Grayson split.
Any mention of romance has my mind swirling with one thing only—a dark-haired man with eyes that stayed locked on mine.
Marcus let it slip he was at their place and explained his upheaval over the guitar string. It made me snicker to think of how frustrated he must be, but there’s also something else layered under there.
Sadness.Hurt.
I’ve always been the first person Kane would tell everything to. Despite knowing I’m not anymore, I can’t stop my traitorous heart from wanting to check my messages, hoping he’s texted to tell me about it. We’d laugh about how absurdit is, and he’d wonder who could’ve taken it, knowing it was me.
I shake my head clear as we head home, Marcus and Grayson trailing after Morgan and me then setting themselves up in the living room. My heart pangs at the thought of one missing person that should be here but slowly the banter between Morgan and Marcus distracts me enough that my shoulders loosen a bit. I feel myself relaxing for the first time in a couple weeks.
The exhaustion of the last few weeks seems to be finally hitting me as my eyes start to droop. Laughter fills the room, and the TV blares from the seventh round of Mario Kart, when I decide it’s time for me to look after myself. I can’t keep going like this—the depression has been clinging to my skin, making every day feel ten times harder.
I grab my phone and request a therapy appointment, knowing I cannot keep this self-destructive pattern of working so hard I have no time to think. This is the first break I’ve allowed myself in two weeks and it has my body crashing.
I needed a night like tonight—just time spent with my best friends, my chosen family. It helps dull the pain I’ve been in over the past few weeks. The empty space is still there, all of us aware of who we’re missing, but it’s less than it has been lately. It’s nice to have moments like these, where I don’t feel like I might be crushed under the weight of the sadness of missing him.
“C’mon Ave, it’s your turn. I’ve had enough of losing to Marcus for the night,” Morgan says as she flings the remote in my lap. Her blonde curls bounce as she gets up and walks into her room.
Marcus laughs from his seat next to me, his big hand covering my knee and giving it a squeeze. The comfort of itmakes my eyes get all watery. He looks at me with some sort of understanding. “Yeah Ave, let’s go. I could use someone that offers some real competition.”
A loud scoff follows from the area Morgan ran off to. A giggle slips out of my mouth at their antics.
From his spot on the floor, Grayson asks, “How is the shelter, Ave? Have you had any new dogs this week?” His demeanor is quiet and steady, helping to settle me. He’s such a peaceful force to be around, always there as a shoulder to lean on.
Marcus started bringing Grayson around sophomore year, and he immediately blended into our little family. As the complete opposite to Marcus’s chaos, he brings calm to this group. We haven’t spent as much time together one-on-one as I have with the others, but I know that if I ever need anything, Grayson will be there without a moment of hesitation.
The week of the breakup, he alternated between sleeping on my couch and Kane’s, in case either of us needed him.
