She wants to break up.
I reach into my head for anything to say, for the panic that has taken over to let me out so I can stop the love of my life from walking out that door.
How can she think this is what’s best for us?
“Ave—” I gasp out, my mouth feeling as if it’s full of sand as she opens the door.
She turns back toward me, hand on the door handle and tears still filling her eyes. “I just…need space, Kane. And you need to let me go.”
The door slams shut behind her.
I stare at the closed door, willing her to walk back through it. I slump down the wall next to the door until I hit the tile, then drop my head into my hands and let the tears roll down my face. My breaths come out in short pants, and, unable to stop myself from shaking, I finally let the panic take me.
My airway feels like it’s closing, the walls around me squeezing tighter and tighter. My shirt is almost too tight on my skin and my thoughts are so clouded with black, I feel myself getting lightheaded.
How in the hell did we end uphere?
I don’t know how long I sit there before my thoughts start to clear and the brain fog starts to lift. The shaking has receded to small aftershocks, the tears lining my cheeks slowly dry up.
I get up and race across the foyer and into the living room for my phone. I try calling her and it immediately goes to voicemail. I throw my phone across the room and it shatters on impact. Knowing it’s a lost cause until I can replace it tomorrow, I sit down where I’m standing and let it all out. The sobs wrack my body as the thoughts penetrate me from every direction.
You’re not good enough for her.
You’re not good enough for anyone.
Minutes or hours later, I finally peel myself up off the floor again. The TV returned to the streaming home screen, the fan the only noise in the house. I decide to pick up the pieces of my shattered heart.
I contemplate running after her, but she asked for space. If that’s what she wants from me, I’ll listen...and just hope that someday, she finds her way back tome.
I snap backto the present, racking my brain for something I could’ve missed that night. Avery was hurt, butshestill leftme. But if seeing me with another girl made her jealous enough to bring this old game back up, there must be more to it.
I finally pull out my phone to let the group know not to worry about her for the night, only to find a text from dear old dad waiting for me. I’ve turned alerts for his texts off, a part of what my therapist tells me issetting healthy boundaries.
Instead of getting upset the second I see his texts, I can look at them when I’m in a more clear headspace. Which means not now, given where I’m currently lying. But since I clearly haven’t put myself through enough emotional damage tonight, I click on the message.
Sperm Donor
If you insist on behaving in such a manner, I request your presence at dinner next Thursday night. You may bring the girl if it suits you.
I scoff then send back a quickgot it.
The girl.
As if Avery hasn’t been over countless times through the years. She’s been at my side for every big function, acting as a buffer for me and my dad and letting me show her off to all his rich prick friends.
But I haven’t told my parents we broke up. There’s no point—I plan to get my girl back eventually. May as well save myself from my father offering me up as a marriagecandidate for the daughters of all his high-society friends to broker a business deal.
I blow out a breath to try to calm the racing thoughts inside my head and turn on my side, gazing up at Avery. I reach up to feel her breathing, resting my hand on her stomach as I slowly doze off, feeling more at peace than I have in weeks.
I stare up at the spinning fan blades as my mind turns over itself. My chest is loose as I feel her breath but my mind spins faster than it’s in weeks trying to piece together how we got here. The pranks, the breakup, my dad and his ultimatum swirl around me until finally my eyes can no longer stay open and I succumb to the sleep that takes me away.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
avery
Dancing With Your Ghost – Sasha Alex Sloan
Iwake with a start, my head pounding as I sit up and try to get my bearings.
