“I really love my shoes,” he says. “And I suspect they love me back.”
“Was it ecstasy? MDMA? Did you even know what you were doing? You don’t take drugs. You’ve never taken drugs.”
“I know. But I wanted to do something you would do. I wanted to impress you. I’m really sorry you’re not on it, too. I think Olivia would have given you some. But you were talking to Drake. And then you were pulling me away. And the next thing I know we’re in a taxi and my heart is racing and I want to touch you so badly and...whoa.”
V undoes her straitjacket and lets it drop to the floor. She takes her glasses off and levels J with a look.
“Oh, honey,” she says. “How does it feel?”
“So far, sooooooo good. Why haven’t I done this before?”
“I’m so happy for you.”
“I want us to become one, V. Let’s become one.”
V laughs. “I’m not sure your balloon’s going to inflate tonight. That’s a common side effect of MDMA.”
“Shit. Olivia didn’t tell me that.”
“Probably would’ve ruined the mood.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay.” V sits down next to him on the bed. “Did you have a good time?”
“Yeah, I did. Jun and Arthur have it, you know. They got there.”
“It was very sweet to see. And your song was nice.”
J would normally wince at the adjectivenice. But he decides to let it wrap him as a compliment right now.
Then he remembers Hotline Bling and says, “I did get jealous, though.”
“Yeah, me too. Obviously.”
“I liked this little experiment. I guess even though it was painful to see you flirting with someone else it also made me want you more.”
V leans back on the bed. J follows suit.
“We were strangers again!” V says to the ceiling.
J turns on his side to face her. “We don’t have to do this too often, though, right?”
V reaches over and takes off his beret. Then she softly runs her fingers behind his ear.
“No,” she says, “but I’m glad we tried.”
J reaches around to the small of V’s back and lingers there, forgetting where he got this motion from.
“I love you,” he says. Then he repeats it as a pronouncement. “I love youso much.”
“Yes, I know,” V says, gently stroking his arm, then moving her hand away. “That’s a side effect, too.”
“I want us to be together,” J says sleepily. “But I also want us to be separate. Is that wrong?”
“No. That’s not wrong at all. After two years, that’s the hard part, isn’t it? Figuring out how to do that?”
“I love you.”
