This is
a movie
you’ll never see
The greatest story ever told
This is
an ending
to endings
That’s you and me when we get old
For the first few seconds, it feels like a good idea to offer this song. But he hasn’t counted on how real it would feel to sing it, how real V’s absence would sit at the center of it. He’s no longer in control of the song or its outcome. He’s not in control of anything anymore. He is singing these lines as if they are the most honest words he’s ever penned, and he is bereft because he’s not sure that’s good enough. He has slowed them down and is offering them as a hymn, trying to turn his heartbreak into something loving. He is starting to tear up, and the guests are starting to tear up, too. They think he’s overwhelmed by the couple before him, and they have no idea that he is sad because the only person he wants to be watching is not watching, that the only person he wants to be here is no longer here for him. He is crying because while he wants it to be her fault, he suspects it’s his own, that he leaned on the wrong lever and sent the train careening off the tracks.
As he gets to the final verse, there is a reverent silence that’s rare even for a concert.
This is
the mapping
of what’s happening
when the credits have rolled
This is what happens
when two atoms
bump into each other
and explode
This is
a movie
you’ll never see
The greatest story ever told
This is
an ending
to endings
That’s you and me when we get old
His voice quavers on the last line, and that’s how he gets them, that’s how he reaches into their hearts and pulls out their sympathy. When he finishes, there’s an abundance of applause. J looks out at the large ballroom and thinks that this is the world that V is entering into, this is the place success will take her. She will measure in millions. He will measure in thousands. She will applaud when he sings, but she won’t really know what he means.
He knows she has the livestream information. He knows other people still have their phones up, recording as if he’s famous, or maybe just because he passed out in a cake.
“I dedicate that to the woman I love. And to making it through.” Then, remembering why he’s here, he turns to Celestia and Roger and says, “I wish you a lifetime of belief and love, and a script you both write together, long into getting old.” Celestia mouths the wordsthank youwhile Roger looks at his watch. There is more applause, and Roger looks up from his watch and smiles as the Very Important Action Star comes onstage to make his next introduction.
“Well done,” the Very Important Action Star says, and as J walks off, he wonders if perhaps they’ll become friends. No one will bewaiting for him backstage, or at home, or in his voicemail. As he walks off the stage, the ballet dancers take their places.
