“Amsterdam?” I almost shout. “For how long?”
“At least a few months,” Jasmine says. “Maybe longer, if things go well. I know it’s a long time. But it’s a great opportunity to get our music out. Who knows when this could happen again.”
“Jaz, you can’t just drop out of school.”
“I already made the decision.”
“Well, it’s not a good one—”
“What about you? You’re not in school, either,” she quickly reminds me. “Did you forget?”
Her words sting. I press my lips together, unsure what to say back. “I told you, I’m reapplying this fall. I’m basically done with all my applications,” I lie. “I even applied to a film scholarship and made it to the next round.” I remember the one Leon told me about.
“A scholarship? You never mentioned that,” she says.
“Well, you don’t tell me everything, either.”
A silence.
Jasmine stares into her tea, a note of guilt in her voice. “I’m sorry I’m only telling you now. I wanted to do it in person. And I needed the time to make the decision for myself.”
“Do Mom and Dad know?”
“Of course not,” she says, keeping her voice low. “That’s why you need to keep this a secret.”
“Jaz—” I start.
“At least for right now, okay? Promise you won’t say anything.”
I stare at her for a long moment. Then I let out a breath. “You know I won’t. But I’m not taking the bullet if they find out. You know how they worry.”
“They’re always worried,” Jasmine says, leaning back again. “That’s just how they are, especially about me. I haven’t felt better in a long time. Staying closer to home isn’t going to will me to perfect health. And I know how to take care of myself.”
Jasmine struggles with chronic anemia, which isn’t uncommon in the family. It causes her body to store too much iron, making her more tired than usual. She has to get blood transfusions here and there, which isn’t nearly as bad as it sounds. But my parents constantly fixate on her health.
“I know you can. I’m just… surprised.” I don’t know what else to say.
Jasmine reaches over, touching my hand. “I should havetold you sooner, okay? Who knows. Maybe it won’t work out with the music career. But you’ll always lose the things you don’t go after.”
I want to convince her to stay. We barely see each other already. There’s a sharp pain in my chest, making it hard to get the words out. “When am I even gonna see you again?”
“I’m not sure,” she says, frowning. “We might be going much sooner than I thought. So it might not be for a while.” She squeezes my hand.
I stare at my plate, trying not to be upset. I thought she was dropping in for lunch, making up for the time she’s been gone. Suddenly, she’s heading to another country? And she can’t even tell me for how long? I don’t want her to go. I want her to stay close to home and visit more like she promised. My heart beats faster, but there’s no point in arguing, because it sounds like she’s already made up her mind. So I take a deep breath, keeping these thoughts to myself. “It’s alright,” I manage to say. “As long as this is what you really want.”
Jasmine smiles from across the table. Another secret I have to keep for her. I don’t ask her more about it. Because I don’t want it to ruin the rest of our lunch. But all I can think about is how much I’m going to miss her.
Three
It’s chilly when we leave the restaurant. We’re standingat the corner, waiting for Jasmine’s ride to pick her up. The clouds are thickening above us, casting shadows along the sidewalk. Jasmine tilts her head at the sky. “Looks like it’s gonna rain,” she says. “You should probably get going, too.”
“You really can’t stay longer?” I ask.
“My friend is waiting for me,” she says. “We have to get back to Ann Arbor soon.” She looks at my hand. “What’s in the bag, anyway?”
I glance down, remembering I brought it with me. “Nothing.” I move the paper bag behind me. Jasmine gives me a suspicious look. I think she’s about to ask again when the car pulls up beside us. Jasmine checks her phone. “I have to go,” she says. Then she turns to me, hugging me tight. “I’m glad I got to see you.”
“Glad I got to see you, too.”
