She’s not mine. Not yet. And she might not be for a long time. But time has never stopped me before.
I came to New York to advance my revenge agenda. Instead, a fiery pixie redesigned my lifelong beliefs, my values, and my plans.
A thirst for revenge would only keep me connected to him. I don’t want to give him so much power.
It’s hard to acknowledge that my driving force might have been all wrong. For years, I believed I needed to destroy my father to feel better about losing my friend.
I didn’t grieve for Noah. Not the way he deserved. I didn’t allow myself a space to accept what happened. Perhaps that was a cowardly way to deal with everything.
I don’t know anymore. Because the only thing I know—I used to know—was revenge. Roxy is right; it gave my father power over me.
I want my child to have a father he can trust. A father he can rely on. A father who will always stand up for him.
I want to be a different father from my own.
While my revenge was eating me alive, fatherhood is giving me a new lease on life.
I attach the valve.
We can’t avoid the conversation anymore. If I want to be present, really present, in my child’s life, I need to make sure Roxy forgives me for the deception that led us together.
My phone chimes. I wipe my hands and grab it, the latent worry that settled in my bones when I found out Roxy was pregnant spiking. Is she okay?
Roxy
Corm called. Where are you?
Quinn doesn’t waste time. I look around the grim space, the source of peace. It’s bittersweet to finish a job like this. But that sentiment is on the back burner right now.
Is she going to fight us on the offer?
Is she going to remain stubborn?
Is she upset I went to them?
But I can’t control her thoughts, feelings, or actions. What I can do is let her in a bit more. To share more of myself with her.
Before I talk myself out of it, I text her the address.
Roxy
What are you doing in Brooklyn?
Come and see for yourself.
I wait for anxiety or some sort of alarm bell, butnothing happens. Maybe sharing my life with someone doesn’t need to be taxing. The concept feels stupid, because Roxy isn’t someone.
Jesus. I do love her!
She’s the one.
Now I only have to make her see that.
Chapter 26
Roxy
“Are you sure this is the right place?”
