“In a week.” I could slap myself for fighting for that timeline.
“What?” She deflates. “A week is too long. You should go to him. Now.”
“This is not a movie, Tee.”
“But you love him. Imagine how much he is suffering, not knowing what’s going tohappen. Loving you from afar and hoping you will love him back. How much it cost him to stay away.”
She really needs to read something other than romance novels.
“I don’t know where he is.” How have I been so stupid? I let him go.
He’s been nothing but patient. Awarding me the most important gift—choice. And to pay him back, I banished him and let him wonder and worry.
“Find out,” Tee says, her tone irritated.
A beat.
I wait for hesitation. For indecision. For fear.
What settles is an all-consuming need to tell Liam how much I miss him. That I love him.
“Let’s go.” I stand up and march out of there like a madwoman.
I need to find my future husband—the father of my child—and tell him I love him.
This can’t wait.
I only hope I didn’t take too long.
Chapter 32
Liam
The heat clings to my skin even after sunset, thick and damp. I welcome the discomfort.
Cicadas scream from the jungle beyond the dirt road, the sound rising and falling like a breath I haven’t been able to catch for the past two weeks.
“You look like you’re waiting for someone to show up.” Alf hands me a beer and sits beside me on his rocking chair on the veranda.
I take a sip, staring down the dirt road that leads to the jungle. Red dust still clings to my boots from today’s build, dried mud cracking along the soles.
I don’t tell him that I’m waiting for Roxy to show up. Not here, of course. She has no idea where I am.
I’m waiting… hoping… for her to show up for us. For our future. For the baby. And for me. Yes, goddammit, for me.
It’s like as soon as I agreed to this stupid timeout, my patience reached its limits. Distance was supposed to calm me. Ground me. Instead, it scraped me raw.
How long can I keep giving with nothing in return?
Fuck unconditional love.
I have a condition, it turns out. I want her to love me back.
Leaving her alone was a mistake. I tell myself I did it for her. For her sense of control.
But sitting here, listening to the jungle breathe, it feels more like cowardice dressed up as restraint.
I’m not there, and I can’t remind her what she would be missing. Though I’m not sure she has been missing anything.
