“I’m fine,” Vanessa said.“Go inside.”
Jackson picked up Penelope and went inside.
Vanessa stared at Paul with accusing eyes.A faint streak of mascara made a track down one cheek.“You’re not welcome here.”
Paul nodded and started walking away.
She followed him across the lawn like a security escort.“Don’t come back.”
He paused, mid-stride.It occurred to him that she might have plans to return to the cabin.“I’m leaving tomorrow.”
“So?”
“I won’t be at the cabin.”
“Neither will I,” she said.“I’d rather burn it down than stay there another night.”
This was a relief to Paul, because he didn’t consider it a safe place.At the same time, he felt a pang of sadness.The summer rental they’d squabbled over was now cursed, unwanted by both parties, tainted by memories of their relationship.While he watched her face, her mouth trembled with emotion.
“I’m sorry,” he said stiffly.“I never meant to hurt you.”
She crossed her arms over her chest, her expression bitter.
“I hope you’ll give me a chance to explain someday.”
“I won’t.”
He hung his head, dejected.Kyle’s question floated back to him—have you told her how you feel?Paul wanted to say the words, but he knew the time wasn’t right for an emotional declaration.If he told her he loved her, she’d laugh in his face.Or fly at him like a wildcat and claw him to shreds.
“You know what the worst thing is?”she asked in a hoarse voice.“Bennett didn’t care about Emily.He didn’t spend time with her, or bond with her.You did.You let her get attached.”She poked at his chest with her finger.“She didn’t cry when we left Denver.She doesn’t miss him, but you…”
Paul hated himself for causing Emily pain.“Do you think I planned this?”
“No.You thought only of the pleasure of the moment.”
“I tried to keep my distance,” he said from between clenched teeth.
“You failed.”
Paul wanted to defend his actions by accusing her of being too sexy to resist, but that wasn’t fair.He could have avoided her.He could have left the day she’d identified the scar on his shoulder, or the day she’d discovered Kyle’s business card.The risks he’d dismissed to be with her were indefensible, in hindsight.
“You failed,” she continued, “and you lied, and you weren’t even that good.”
“I wasn’t that good?Now who’s lying?”
“I knew I couldn’t trust you.”
“I told the truth when it counted,” he growled.“I told you things I’ve never told anyone else.”
“You didn’t tell me your real name.”
“You know what else I didn’t tell you?”he said, his gaze narrow.“I didn’t tell you that the man I killed was attempting a carjacking.The victim was a woman with a child in the back seat.He was trying to pull her out of the vehicle.I had to draw my weapon, even though it was a public safety risk, and I had to fire it, because he took aim at me.We both hit our targets, only mine was a kill shot.He pulled the trigger again as he went down.His bullet struck the woman in the neck.”
Vanessa’s face went pale.She sank to a sitting position on the grass.
“It’s my fault she got hit, and I have to live with that.I have to live with the memory of her baby screaming while I put pressure on the wound and prayed neither of us would bleed out before the ambulance arrived.”
“Did she make it?”
