She coloured slightly. “In Hertfordshire, you stared at me often, but I believed you only looked to find fault. And weargued so frequently.”
Darcy looked aghast. “If I looked—or stared—at you in Hertfordshire, Miss Bennet, it was to admire you, not find fault. The night you refused to dance with me at Lucas Lodge, I unwisely told Miss Bingley I was admiring your fine eyes and pretty face, and she teased me about it frequently afterwards. However, I did not realise I stared quite so often or so obviously; I certainly did not mean to make you uncomfortable. I do not recall any arguments, but I thoroughly enjoyed ourdebates, which, if I recall correctly, you won most often. I admired that you did not alter your opinions to match mine; I could make five contradictory statements in the same conversation in London, and most ladies would agree with every statement.”
“What of the conversation about what makes an accomplished woman? That was clearly an argument, Mr Darcy. Who won that one?” she enquired archly.
He laughed, taking her by surprise. She privately acknowledged he was most handsome when he smiled and laughed, and Elizabeth was sure she had never seen him look so handsome before. “You did, most decidedly,” he said. “But I did not argue with you in that—Miss Bingley argued and was the obvious loser in the debate. I said I only knew a few accomplished women, then Miss Bingley recited her list of so-called accomplishments, adding that extensive reading was required to make one accomplished. You replied that you were surprised we knew any, causing Miss Bingley to state she knew many accomplished women, completely contradicting her early statement. She went from knowing only a few to knowing many without realising it. And I stand by my comment that only a few women have worthwhile accomplishments, the most important of which is to expand her mind through extensive reading.”
Elizabeth’s mouth dropped open at his recounting of the conversation. After a moment, she spoke, head slightly bowed. “Again, sir, it appears I have misunderstood and misjudged you. I believed you agreed with Miss Bingley’s list of accomplishments and found my own wanting.”
“It was perhaps clumsy, Miss Bennet, but I was attempting to compliment you,” Mr Darcy said, dismayed at her admission of how she viewed the conversations he so enjoyed. After a moment, he spoke again. “Miss Bennet, I do admire you, but it seems we have not understood each other very well. Could we start anew? I would like to court you, but under the circumstances, perhaps we could get to know each other better before we discuss …. more.”
Elizabeth stared at him for several moments, her cheeks burning brightly. “I would like that, Mr Darcy. I have allowed your comment at the assembly to colour my opinions of you unfairly throughout our acquaintance. Might I … would you allow me to consider your request and give you an answer tomorrow?”
“I would be happy to walk again with you tomorrow, and any other day you allow me to do so. Please take as much time as you need to answer—I would like to create a better impression than I have thus far. It would also be best if my aunt were not aware of any understanding between us before you leave for London,” Darcy said, then sighed again before continuing. “My aunt refuses to listen to any wishes besides her own regarding my supposed engagement to her daughter. Neither Anne nor I desire to wed the other; Anne because she prefers never to wed, and, well, I, um, prefer another, obviously.” He coloured as he said the last. “Aunt Catherine will be livid when I announce an engagement to anyone other than Anne. I suggest you not mention my request at the parsonage so it does not accidentally get back to her until things are more certain between us.”
“I can agree to that,” Elizabeth said. “I will not write to Jane about it either. Since I have been at Hunsford, I have wondered whether Mr Collins has been reading my post. Several letters I received since arriving appear to have had their seals broken and heat used to reseal, and more than once, I have noticed that letters I placed downstairs to be posted were disturbed.”
Darcy scowled at that and changed the topic to one he hoped would be more pleasant. “How is your sister enjoying spring in Hertfordshire?”
“She is in London, sir, and has been rather disappointed,” Elizabeth’s voice was sharp as she recalled the melancholic tone of her sister’s letters.
“Disappointed?” he asked.
“Yes, Jane visited Miss Bingley when she first arrived in town, but they claimed to have an appointment, and Jane did not stay long. Theywaited three weeks to return the call and only stayed a few minutes, making it obvious how displeased they were. Jane believes the connection severed after their behaviour and has made no additional attempts to visit them. She is disappointed because she believed Mr Bingley cared for her as much as she did for him,” Elizabeth explained.
Darcy paled slightly. “She cared for him?”
“Yes,” Elizabeth said, eyeing him carefully and wondering what about that statement made him pale.
“Then I am very sorry for her, for Bingley will not marry her,” Darcy gently stated, then hurried to explain when he saw the anger in Elizabeth’s eyes. “It has nothing to do with her and entirely to do with him and his family. Bingley is engaged and has been for some time. It is not widely known because the girl is not yet out. His father and hers made the match several years ago and signed the settlement on behalf of their children. I am only aware of it because I knew Bingley when the arrangements were made and tried to warn him against the match. It did not make sense for him to engage himself when neither would be prepared to marry for years.
“On several occasions since, I have warned him to be careful and not raise expectations with women, but he is personable and, quite frankly, a bit of a flirt. I warned him at Netherfield, but not until the ball did I realise the entire neighbourhood was anticipating an engagement between your sister and Bingley. I pulled him aside that night and suggested he take his leave of the families in the area and depart for the holiday season to allow talk to die down. I also encouraged him to at least subtly hint to your sister at his engagement after the attention he paid. However, I did not think her heart was touched and believed she would easily recover from the loss of his attention.”
Elizabeth’s eyes flashed with anger. “I would not have expected it of him given his openness and amiability,” she seethed. “He has used my sister very ill. May I tell her of his engagement to see if it will ease her heartbreak?”
“I am not certain, Miss Bennet,” he replied slowly. “I have broken a confidence to tell you this much, but perhaps it would be best if she knew. It may help your sister to know he is promised elsewhere and cannot easily break that attachment. However, Bingley has broken faithwith more than just your sister, so mayhap I should not feel so badly to have broken a promise to him.”
She eyed him cautiously. “Whatever do you mean, sir?”
A pained expression crossed his face. “I have not laid eyes on Bingley since I left Netherfield. When I returned to my room after the ball, my valet informed me of a conversation he overheard between two maids. Bingley and his sister intended to compromise me that night. After confronting my former friend about their treacherous intentions, I returned to my room, only to find Miss Bingley attempting to barge in and berating my valet for obstructing her. Bingley trailed behind, insisting I marry her, a proposition I unequivocally rejected. I told both of them I would cut her if she ever approached me again, and I departed Netherfield that very night. My valet ensured the staff knew I did not spend the night there before he departed that morning with my belongings.
“The way Miss Bingley treats the household staff earns her no loyalty, so they readily corroborated my account of the incident. Since then, Bingley has made a few attempts to contact me, and his sister has also tried reaching out to my sister. These have been unsuccessful, as my servants have been instructed to deny them entry. Eventually, Bingley sent a letter attempting to explain himself, which I did read, though I chose not to respond.”
Elizabeth looked at him aghast. “But I believed him to be your friend!”
“I did as well, Miss Elizabeth,” Darcy agreed sadly. “However, I have realised he is more avaricious than I had realised. He and his sister planned to trap me into marriage to hide the fact that her dowry was nearly gone. He hoped I would overlook this and accept her without her dowry due to our friendship, even though I have told him for years I would never marry her for any reason.”
“How could her dowry be gone?” Elizabeth cried. “She spoke frequently of her dowry of twenty thousand pounds.”
“She constantly overspends her allowance, and I have heard whispers that Bingley has begun gambling frequently. I do not know when that began, as I have made a habit of avoiding places where men are drawn into such vices and tend to avoid those who gamble heavily. I wasunaware that Bingley joined in with that sort of vice, although, in hindsight, there were a few indications,” Darcy explained.
“Then I am glad Jane will not marry him!” she said heatedly before becoming downcast. “I have recently met someone who appeared to be everything good but whose appearance of goodness hides a black heart. I am very sorry to have misjudged you, especially as it appears I have been completely wrong in several instances. I have been accused of putting too much faith into appearances and first impressions.” Elizabeth paused and drew in a breath as she took a moment to think. Since encountering Mr Darcy at Rosings, she felt she understood him, at least a little, and the two had several positive conversations during his visits at the parsonage. In fact, Elizabeth considered him a friend now, but despite Charlotte’s hints, she found it difficult to believe Mr Darcy was interested in her, and she was certain the dichotomy between their circumstances would prevent him from ever furthering their acquaintance beyond friendship. If she were honest with herself, she knew it would be very easy for her to fall in love with the reserved man from Derbyshire if he only gave her a little encouragement.
“Mr Darcy, I no longer need until tomorrow; I have decided. I would like to accept your offer of courtship. I will ask my aunt and uncle to let me stay with them in London for a few weeks, though I will also have to ask my father for permission. I do not think he will protest too much as he only cares for my happiness.”
Darcy drew in a quick breath at her statement, and a pleased grin threatened to spread across his face. Attempting to hold back his feelings, he reached out to touch her hand briefly before speaking: “Since you are concerned about your letters being read at the parsonage, if you would give me your notes tomorrow morning, I will see them posted for you,” he offered. “I promise not to read your letters, and you could arrange to remain in London before you leave. If you like, you can have them send their replies to me so we do not risk exposure at the parsonage.”
“I will give you notes to send to my father, sister, and uncle and request they not mention anything directly in their response,” Elizabeth said. “Just as you prefer your aunt not to find out yet, I prefer my mother not to know until things are more settled. Mama was terriblyupset when I refused Mr Collins’s offer last autumn and was equally upset when Mr Bingley and his company departed Netherfield without a word. She would be tempted to throw me off entirely if nothing were to result from our courtship. In her mind, my refusing the heir of Longbourn was a terrible offence, and if I did not ‘secure’ you, who is worth infinitely more, she would never let me hear the end of it. My mother values wealth more than substance, but I assure you, that is not the case for me.” She blushed brightly as she spoke these words.
