“How could you hide from me now?” The question was more of a whispered plea as it slipped from his lips. “I meant something to you once.” Try as he might, his friendship with Lottie had never been replicated with anyone else.
“The truth would only cause a disturbance in your healing. Remaining hidden from you—from society has been best for everyone. There was no need to complicate the situation. You needed to focus on surviving, which you almost didn’t.”
His eyes narrowed on her face, marred onlyby the flush of guilt and her brow creasing in worry. “Complicate the situation? The woman I long believed dead is alive. Am I supposed to leave here knowing that information and do nothing? How could you think me so heartless?”
Pressing her palms on her thighs, Charlotte stood, pacing to the other end of the room, her hands rubbing her cheeks. “It’s not like that. You must return and pretend you never saw me. Any other action would risk much scandal and distress to my family. It would be easier for you and your wife if you simply forget my existence. Finish your recovery. Move on.”
Perry scoffed, ignoring the fact that she still considered him married. Perhaps the news of his widowed status hadn’t traveled this far. He was too angry from being dismissed to correct her. “You have forgotten our time together so easily?”
Charlotte flinched. “It makes no difference what happened between us.” She cast her gaze down at the rich Persian carpet, studying the intricate navy and red design. “There is no sense revisiting the past. If you care for me as you once did, you will continue on to Bodmin and forget that you have seen me.” Smoothing her skirts, she came to stand beside him.
Perry’s mouth gaped open as she waited, hugging her arms around her waist. As though he was dismissed. The conversation was over.
“It seems as though you are almost well enough to travel, which gladdens me. It pained me to see you suffer.” A small smile tugged at her lips as she placed a hand on his arm.
Bristling, he shook her off and stood, towering above her petite frame. His hands came to caress her shoulders, and he peered into her eyes, looking for any sign of the woman he used to know. How could this stranger before him be so…cruel? Dismissive?
Her words glossed over the earth-shattering impact of their reunion.
What could it mean for their future? How could he keep her a secret when he wanted to remain close?
Perhaps Charlotte had forgotten. His body remembered every lingering touch, every fetching smile, as though each part of him were embedded with memories from long ago.
“You would rather stay locked away in the country and never again see the city? What of your family? It is hardly living,” he questioned, unsatisfied.
She made an impertinent sound. “I am quite content. Do not presume to know the parameters of my happiness.” Stepping out of his grip, she placed her fists on her hips.
Was this truly the woman he had known? Or had the Lottie of his youth been replaced with a colder, more distant version of the warm woman he once held in his arms? Perhaps their love had been a dream, and he was a fool to believe being reunited with hermeant something. A return to the place he had always longed for—Lottie’s heart.
Exhaustion swept over him as a deep sorrow threatened to tear him asunder. A loss he was suffering for a second time. The impact of her cold demeanor hit him like a blow and almost knocked him off his feet.
“You must return to bed. I will call someone to assist you.” She wrapped an arm around his waist and the tension his body had been clinging to was released.
“I will be fine,” he said, leaning into her embrace. Her touch, though distant, was comforting like nothing else. The simple act of her guiding him back to his room warmed him. Would these be the last crumbs of affection he could receive from her? She had tended him during his fever, of that he was certain. Somewhere inside her must reside a flicker of the feeling she used to hold. Their former affection was too strong to simply be cast aside.
Would he have the strength to leave Fermoy and forget her?
The mere prospect chilled him.
Rubbing his hand over his face, he grappled with the reality that the mysterious blackguard who shot him had given him the greatest gift. After all, he hadn’t died and would make a fullrecovery with rest and time. Though some person had tried to kill him, it was Lottie who was delivering him the final blow.
She was forcing him to forget that which he most craved. Quelling the need for her was like a dead leaf attempting to resist blowing away on the fall breeze. Impossible. Senseless.
Perry had no idea how he would survive losing her a second time.
Chapter Sixteen
Have you forgotten our time together so easily?
Charlotte shivered. Those words… The words brought so many unresolved feelings floating to the surface. Of course she hadn’t forgotten. A sob came unbidden, and she did her best to swallow it. She needed to get away from him as quickly as possible. Then, she would have relief from this wound, freshly opened by his presence, and bleeding uncontrollably. The pain was breathtaking.
How could she ever forget what he meant to her?
Why did his anger send a bolt of excitement through her body?
Was she afraid?
Or was she pleased he was so affected by her return to his life?
