“I deeply regret not asking for more information. Your father wouldn’t tell me where you were. My own father wouldn’t allow me to break off my engagement. The duke then told me you had died. Though it killed me, I did as he commanded. I had no reason to fight if you were no longer of this world.”
Nervous energy coursed through her body. Charlotte stood and walked to the window, finding solace in the lush greenery of the garden shining outside. Off in the distance, she could see Aurelia with her nurse, strolling in the direction of the pond, possibly, or perhaps the village. Charlotte gritted her teeth, watching as they moved further away from the house. She had permitted the excursion, as long as they remained unseen, but this was too close for comfort.
Ann had failed at staying out of sight.
Charlotte would have to remind her of the seriousness of the situation.
She was not ready to tell Peregrine everything.
There was a small chance he would leave her be. She was not sure how that would feel; in fact, she imagined it would be devastating if they parted ways once more, but she was ready. The pain was worth the risk, as it always was. Anything for Aurelia.
“I am grateful to my parents for facilitating my escape to the country, whilst also suffering the onslaught of judgment from society in my place. After staying at Fermoy for a certain length of time, I realized I didn’t want to go back. My sisters’ reputations recovered enough, and they made successful matches. I had no desire to return in the middle of their seasons and create an uproar. I am sorry if you feel you have been deceived, but I do not regret the choices I made for myself.”
Peregrine’s eyes bored into her back as she watched her daughter disappear from view. She turned to meet his intense gaze of disapproval.
“I came for you. I was ready to marry you. You were gone.” His gaze softened as he beckoned her to sit next to him on the bed. “My father is the one who deceived me.”
A pang of mercy for him lit in her chest and she sat. He took her hands in his and gave her a look of such tenderness, she flushed with shame.
“I never told them what happened between us,” she said, and watched as his mouth flattened at the words. “I treasured our time together that summer. I would be grateful if you did me the kindness of forgetting you have seen me.”
His face fell at her request. “What kind of scoundrel am I for ruining a beautiful young woman and leaving her to waste away in the country? That is not the man I am. You must allow me to satisfy my honor.” He brought a hand carefully to her face and leveled his gaze with hers. “Let me make things right, Lottie.”
“I am content here, my lord. I want for nothing. I would haveno reason to return to the city—to the life that I never belonged to. How would I even explain my sudden reappearance?” Sweeping her palms over her skirts in a smoothing motion, Charlotte’s gaze flitted to his, assessing his willingness to respect her wishes. “You could only make things right by leaving and forgetting that you ever saw me here."
“You do not miss the company of your family? The excitement of the city? Surely it is a life spent in much loneliness out here. That hardly seems like something you deserve.”
Charlotte cleared her throat. “I enjoy the solitude. I stay busy in the garden, reading, and all sorts of quiet pursuits that I would likely be too busy for in the city. As I said before, I am content. You may return to your wife with a clean conscience.”
Perry scoffed. “My wife is dead.”
Speechless, Charlotte ignored the heat creeping up her cheeks. A strange new hunger coiled within her at the admission. No. She was resolute and would not change her mind. Her choices had been stolen from her in the past. It would not happen again, regardless of how the new information affected her.
Perry must leave.
It was the only solution.
Chapter Eighteen
Bristling after his discussion with Charlotte, Perry cursed his weakness as he watched her leave. How could a bedridden man convince her to… Well, to what exactly? Perry hadn’t quite accepted what he wanted to do with the new information he had gathered from his former love.
Was she to remain a former love?
His hands still itched to touch her with the same familiarity they shared in the past. Seeing her healed a part of him he hadn’t realized was so deeply damaged. Could he truly just leave her, as she had requested? His body physically rebelled at the thought. Perry suspected he was incapable of abandoning her again. How could he convince her not to waste this opportunity that had been given to them after years of suffering in loveless solitude? Painfully longing for something that could never be, while he was trapped in a marriage neither he nor his wife wanted. It was breathtaking to consider that perhaps it was possible, after all. To bask in that happiness once more.
Charlotte Townsend could be his.
Given time, perhaps he could woo her to his side. Convinceher to explore what had been cut short in the past. They had no distractions out here in the country.
Perry scrubbed a hand through his hair and moved his legs to dangle over the side of the bed. First, he must regain his strength and get out of this dratted bed. Every day since his fever had ebbed, he grew stronger. Now that he was recovering his former good health, they wouldn’t have long before they had to behave according to societal expectations. If he were to court her properly, he couldn’t be seen alone with her. Society believed her an untouched, unmarried woman, and she deserved to be treated as such. The time they had together while he recovered would be precious. He must take advantage.
Of course, there was the matter of also figuring out who had shot him and if it had anything to do with the mysterious letter they had received from Mrs. Boots.
It was strange how, after seeing Charlotte, none of that mattered.
Well, he did have to be alive to court and marry her; that much was nonnegotiable.
Perry gave a soft chuckle and stroked his beard. He would need a good shave. He hadn’t spent much time on his appearance lately. It wouldn’t be particularly seductive to go chasing after a woman looking like a wild man. Perhaps a footman could assist him.
