Lucy threwherself onto the sofa the minute she walked in the door.
Mrs. Tucker walked into the room, her footsteps quick and lively. “What happened?”
“Nothing happened.”
“You aren’t acting like nothing happened.”
Lucy sat up and put a hand on each of her knees. “I told him he was charming. I told him his eyes were magnificent, and he treated me like he treated every other woman in town who thinks the same.”
Mrs. Tucker sat down beside her. “What do you mean by that?”
Lucy groaned. “I’ve seen women throwing themselves at him since the moment I came here. He always acts as if he doesn’t notice. He just moves on with conversations and deliveries as if the women haven’t said or done anything.”
“But you still like him, don’t you?”
“Yes.”
“Do you think if you tell him who you are, he will go home?”
“I don’t think he will. He just wants to drive his cart and be left alone.”
“But he might, once he knows who you are.”
Mrs. Tucker surely said that in order to cheer her, but it only managed the opposite. The last thing she wanted was to drag an unwilling Mr. Harrison home with her so they could get married. “I’m not sure I want to tell him.”
“You have to tell him.”
“You told me I shouldn’t. Not until I knew his feelings.”
“Well, I’ve changed my mind.”
“Why?”
“If you’ve already told him you cared for him and he had no response, you need to try something else.”
“No, I don’t. I can go home, break off the engagement I should have broken off years ago, and try to find some other man with a title to marry.”
“You won't find anyone like Mr. Harrison.”
“You don’t think I don’t know that? I couldn’t believe my good fortune when I met him. He is good, kind, attractive, and the man knows how to work hard. But I made a terrible mistake and waited too long. As soon as I realized he was decent, I should have told him who I was, because then…” She couldn’t finish.
“Because then you wouldn’t have had your heart broken if he didn’t choose you?”
Lucy nodded, tears springing to her eyes. She was being ridiculous. She’d never planned on a love match. She was practical, and usually managed to get along with anyone. She’d known that as long as the man her family had chosen for her was a good person, she could have made a marriage work with him. But now that she’d gotten to know Mr. Harrison… She shook her head. How would she ever go back to being the woman who could be happy with anyone, as long as her sister got a chance at love? “Am I a terrible person? I don’t know what to do.”
Mrs. Tucker put her arms around her, and Lucy buried her head into her neck. A warm and tender hand landed on Lucy’shead, then trailed its way down her hair. She’d only known Mrs. Tucker for a few weeks, and most of that time Mrs. Tucker hadn’t even known exactly who she was, but in this moment, she was more mother to Lucy than Mama had ever been.
“You aren’t a terrible person. You’re allowed to have feelings for the man to whom you are engaged. And you’re allowed to worry about whether or not you will marry him, and which outcome would make you happiest.”
“Or less miserable. I’m not even thinking about happiness anymore. I don’t think it is possible.”
“Tomorrow is the festival. Go. Spend some time with him away from his cart. Dance with him. Try to kiss him, perhaps. You don’t need to decide quite yet. You still have time.”
“Why does everyone want me to kiss my fiancé?”
Mrs. Tucker laughed. “Who else does?”
“My sister, Helena, suggested the very same thing.”
