Violet did put her hand to her stomach this time. “I can’t even think about food right now. We’ll come up later and check on everyone.”
Jessup looked like he wanted to force her to go with him, but he merely gave her a nod. “Ryan and I will come back later and get your wrecked wall fixed proper.”
“Thanks.”
She and Kade started back toward her house, coming up on the barn. He was taking in their surroundings. Not in a worried way, ready for attack, but almost in an admiring way. “I thought it was marsh and bugs and snakes, but it’s beautiful here.” His gaze moved to her. “Really beautiful.” He brushed the back of his hand against her cheek.
Her heart twisted. He was once again caught in that fake memory, still living the lie she’d fabricated. She took his hand, stopping him. “You know we’re not really married. Right?”
He gave her a pulse-pounding smile. “I know. I was just tweaking your brother.” He looked up toward the tops of the trees. “Teach me how to swing on those ropes. I have this bit of memory where your brother swings down at me from up there.”
She remembered when he talked about how she tugged at his wild side. “You don’t remember everything, do you?”
Kade rubbed his head. “It feels like rubber bands snapping inside my brain. With every snap, something else fills in. But there are still a lot of blank spots.”
“Let’s swing on the rope.”
They kicked off their shoes, and she led the way to the tall live oak. She showed him the crevices for footholds and mounds that were once branches and now served as handles. He kept up easily, and soon they were stepping across the thick branch to where the ropes hung. She pulled one up and handed it to Kade, then brought the other one up for her.
His fingers wrapped around the rope, but he was looking at everything around him. She could see that wild side he’d talked about; it sparked in his eyes and shone in the way he seemed so natural up there.
She felt as precariously balanced inside as she did perched on that branch, her toes curled over the rough bark. She tightened her lips, but the words needed to be said. “Kade, we’ve been wrapped in a bundle of lies since you came here. You’re investigating, you’re in love with me, you’re not in love with me, we’re married.” Trying to have a baby. She pinched the bridge of her nose. She would tell him about that later. “I feel things for you that don’t make sense at all. And the thought of losing you made them even stronger.”
He released a soft breath. “But you didn’t lose me. I’m here.”
“But do you even know who you are? What you feel? What’s real, Kade?” She let out a breath of exasperation. She was about to get herself all tangled up in her words and emotions. Instead, she grasped the rope with both hands, jumped and swung down. Speed tickled her tummy as she flew through the air. All too soon, her feet touched down on the earth.
He clapped, the rope shaking in his hold with the movement. “Nicely done.” He mirrored her moves and flew down. She stepped out of his trajectory, but he came in at a slightly different angle. She put her hands out to slow him, he tried to shift, and they both ended up in a pile of limbs on the ground.
He hovered over her. “You okay? Sorry about that.”
“You’ve been knocking me on my ass since that moment our eyes met across the pit at Headquarters. Figuratively and literally.”
“Ditto.” He lowered his mouth to hers. The kiss was soft and sweet, and he studied her for a moment afterward. “You’re afraid I’m going to hurt you…break your heart. Because someone else did.” He narrowed his eyes, trying to recall something obviously. “Bren.”
“No, I never loved him. I never felt like this with him.”
“Like what?”
Crazy, madly in love. “Like I’d break into the Guard prison to save him.”
“Which astounds me that you did. And succeeded.” He brushed her hair from her face. “But he hurt you anyway.”
She shook her head, but the truth prickled through her. No more lies between her and Kade. “I guess he did. I thought I was in love with him, that he wanted me for who I was. I know I’m in love with you, and I’m scared that you don’t feel the same way.”
He sat back, pulling her hands up so they faced each other, their knees touching. He didn’t let go. “Vee, when I shot you down—Gods, I’m sorry I did that—I knew you’d been lying about us being married. I started getting pieces of memories, a flash of me coming up behind you, about to terminate you?—”
He shook his head. “It was damned confusing because I remembered loving you. It was like I was two different people. Then Ferro appeared, and I slipped into that Vega role I’ve been in for most of my life. That felt more familiar than being a husband, further confirming that you were lying to me. But as Ferro was about to finish you, it was the devastation I felt at the thought of you dying that started snapping everything together. You reached into my dark shattered mind because of what I meant to you. And I pulled the shards back together because of what you meant to me.”
He braced his hand against her cheek. “So no matter the lies and illusions, what we feel for each other is real.” He planted another of those devastatingly tender kisses on her mouth. “That’s real, Violet Castanega.”
The Tryah closed the window between their dimension and the Earthly plane. Drakos sagged into the chair. He had been so close to escaping this place of gray hopelessness.
“Don’t give up yet,” Demis said, looking smug. “My Caido minions are powerful and dedicated, and they have been working on gathering power in their own way. They’ll have enough to see our plan through.”
Fallon huffed out an impatient breath. “But they’re using children. How much power can they really gain from them?”
“They may not possess the power of a Breathed Dragon, but they hold the purity of their emotions: love, hate, fear. My minions have been harnessing and storing these emotions for just this time.”
