“Other alphas will smell me on you. And vice versa. It’s not good for optics.”
“Optics. Right.”Fuck optics, I want to say, but I get it. Morgan’s right. The way I look at her now… I can’t hide that.Not with all the coaching in the world. Not with a suppressant overdose. I could have had so much more time with her if I weren’t just… I don’t know. Such an omega.
I can’t be selfish. This is Morgan’s life’s work, and thousands—maybe millions—of omegas depend on this deal with the state.
I force a wry smile. “So… I go back to the science, you go back to the CEO-ing?”
Morgan is quiet for a beat too long. “Yeah.”
The ache in my chest shifts to that familiar loneliness. “Do I have to, like… sign an NDA about this? About us? Can people know?”
The silence is heavy. Morgan finally answers, “It’s better if they don’t know.”
“Right. That makes sense. Solves the HR problem…”
Morgan kisses the back of my neck. “I didn’t mean to get into this yet. I wanted more time… for you to recover. Hydrate.” The last word is delivered like a joke, but her tone falls flat.
“Yeah, sorry…”
“Don’t apologize.” Her fingers trace soothing circles across my back.
I do my very best to muster my sense of humor. I’m ready to handle this how I always do—ignore the bad feelings, and eventually they’ll go away. “So… what, one more jet hop back across the pond?”
“About that… I need to stay local to finish some business.”
“Oh.”
“You could… stick around the extra few days, if you wanted to.”
I think about being alone in this massive house. Or, even worse, together with Morgan knowing that this is it. This is the end. Vacation is over. Time to go back to real life.
It would be torture. And not the fun kind.
“I think it’s… better if I head home.”
She nods against my neck. “I’ll have Eileen book the tickets. Any special requests?”
“A time machine,” I murmur.
“I’ll get the labs working on that.”
“This trip was… really good. Thank you. I’m glad we could… even if only… for a little while…”
She takes a breath under me, as if to say something, but she hesitates.
It’s like Schrödinger’s inhale. For one precious moment, her next words might be anything.
Finally, she says, “Yeah. Me too.”
Chapter 48
JAMIE
I wake up in the reclined first-class bed, taking stock of the dim cabin.
It’s so easy to believe that the past two weeks have been a dream—that I’m still on my way to our first destination, and the trip is only beginning.
I really would believe it, if not for the ache in my chest and the in-flight TV in front of me clearly displaying our destination. My neck feels oddly bare without the collar, and the glands there itch under the surface. I keep rubbing them, trying to make the sensation go away.
