“There are many things I plan to give you, Elizabeth, but what is in this package, I could not bear for you to share with anyone else.”
She looked at him suspiciously as she unwrapped the string and turned back the paper. Elizabeth’s fingers caressed the delicate lace, and he watched her eyes well up as she rubbed her hands gently over the package. Without warning, she hugged his neck tightly. “How did you know?” she whispered in his ear.
Darcy held her for a few minutes, gently stroking the back of her head as she collapsed against him. Finally, he moved her back away from him so he could look at her and tell her how he came by the lace. “Last April, Colonel Fitzwilliam saw you in London with Miss Lucas and Miss Bennet. He did not approach because he trained recruits all day and was not presentable, but he observed your choice of this lace.That night the good colonel came to Kensington Place because Georgiana feared I would go mad if I did nottalk to someone.” He stroked each of her delicate fingers as he spoke softly to her.“My cousin teased me with tales of seeing you; I was in such turmoil I did the unthinkable—I drank a decanter of brandy and then confessed my love for the beautiful Elizabeth Bennet.” He smiled briefly at her for he rarely remembered seeing her so somber.“I told him everything—the proposal—the letter; as I literally crawled into bed that evening, I called out to him to ask from which merchant I could find the lace; Colonel Fitzwilliam laughed and told me he would make arrangements for me to have the lace.The good colonel knew I would want it; Elizabeth Bennet chose it but did not buy it for some reason. The colonel knew I loved you even then; I kept it for you.”
“Fitzwilliam, when I saw the lace in London, I kept thinking you were somewhere close by and thinking ill of me. By that time, I read your letter at least a dozen times, and I knew if not for my prejudices, I could be choosing this very lace for my wedding. I went back to the lace several times, but I did not buy it because I thought you were lost to me forever. I was discovering myself—how I judged people—how I judged you.You offered me an honor with your proposal. I foolishly threw your love away. It was the first time I admitted to myself I carried any feelings for you.”
“Then the lace was meant for you, Elizabeth,” he whispered as he moved a strand of hair away from her face.
She reached for the hair at the back of his neck, rubbing her finger along the shirt line.“I used to tell Jane the problem with our parents’ marriage was Mama always waited for Papa to make thegrandgesture. She is a very foolish woman, but as much as I adore my father, I believe she wants only some of his attention—the things he showed her when they were first married. They forgot what brought them together.You, Fitzwilliam Darcy, gave me more today than my parents have given to each other in years. You obtained the lace for a woman who thoroughly abused you and refused you.What did I ever do to deserve your love?You made the grand gesture without ever knowing I would love you in return.”
Darcy took her hand and brought it to his lips. “Elizabeth,” hetoo hesitated before saying what he now realized, “you will be—we will be wiser—my parents loved in a manner appropriate for their time and station, but they only showed regard for our family circle, leaving me with all my false pride.You admire your father’s abilities and are grateful for his approval, but you understand although you love his wit, it has its limitations. Do not second-guess; being his daughter does not mean you will make Mr. Bennet’s mistakes any more than I will make those of my father.We are not our parents; our love will be freer, more open—more hopeful.There is no guarantee, Elizabeth; you are more vulnerable than is your father because you love life. That is one of the many reasons I fell in love with you.”
She nodded as he spoke, and Darcy watched as she shook her head as if to shake off the desperation she felt. The shift of her shoulders and the glint of her eyes told him she was ready to face their life together devoid of the apprehension she just experienced. In due time, playfulness rose again. “When, Love, did you know you cared for me? How could you begin? I can comprehend your going on charmingly, when you had once made a beginning; but what could set you off in the first place?”
“I cannot fix on the hour, or the spot, or the look, or the words, which laid the foundation. It is too long ago. I was in the middle before I knew that I had begun.”
“My beauty you had early withstood, and as for my manners—my behavior to you was at least always bordering on the uncivil, and I never spoke to you without rather wishing to give you pain than not. Now, be sincere; did you admire me for my impertinence?”
“I believe it was your wit—the liveliness of your mind of which I first took note.”
“You may call it impertinence, my Love, for it was very little else.The fact is, that you were sick of civility, of deference, of officious attention. You were disgusted with the women who were always speaking, and looking, and thinking for your approbation alone. I roused and interested you because I was so unlike them. There—I have saved you the trouble of accounting for it. To besure, you knew no actual good of me; but nobody thinks of that when they fall in love.”
Darcy loved the quickness of her mind, and he picked up on her playfulness.“I pray thee now, tell me for which of my bad parts didst thou first fall in love with me?”
Elizabeth recognized the familiar Shakespearean lines offered up by Benedick and Beatrice.“For them all together, which maintained so politic a state of evil they will not admit any good to intermingle with them. But for which of my good parts did you first suffer love for me?”
Darcy’s laugh resonated; the woman stirred him in unfamiliar ways. He took a countenance of false hurt. “Suffer love! A good epithet! I do suffer love indeed, for I love thee against my will.”
“In spite of your heart, I think, alas, poor heart!” Her hand rested on his chest.
He touched her chin with his finger; it was the same gesture he used with Georgiana.“Thou and I are too wise to woo peaceably.” He pulled her to him once again.Then they both found happiness in such shared moments.Taking a more serious tone, he then said, “I told your father, Elizabeth, your affectionate behavior for Jane when she was ill at Netherfield touched my heart. I wanted a person such as you to be Georgiana’s sister.”
She turned to him.“Why when you came to Longbourn were you so shy and did not speak to me? Even when you dined here you looked as though you did not care about me.”
“I tried to read your countenance, and you were grave and silent; you gave me no encouragement.”
“I was the same as when you first found me at Pemberley. I was embarrassed.”
“And so was I.”
“You might have talked to me more when you came to dinner.”
“A man who felt less might.”
“You are very lucky, Mr. Darcy,” she teased, “your answer is so reasonable, and I am reasonable enough to accept it.”
He took her hand.“Let us walk for awhile. I love being outdoors.”
“I am anxious,” she said looking up at him, “to see Pemberley again. I wish to walk its many pathways.”
“I have much of our home I wish to share with you, Elizabeth.”
“Despite our contentious times at Rosings, our walks produced some fond memories.The field of wildflowers was beautiful!”
“You were beautiful, turning around and around in it. I could barely contain my ardor! That image lulled me to sleep on many a night.”
“You thought me not foolish?”
