“All it said was ‘Protect them.’ I assume she means her kids.” Waverly turns over and I stare at her adorable little face and the thumb in her mouth. Christ. I don’t want to hand them over to grandparents that they may not know. I rub at my chest and hide my face and the gathering tears.
28. KEIR
I stop and look around, for a person or landmark. My mind is triggered by something, but it just can’t hold onto it. Jolie looks back and takes my hand. “It’s alright. You’re safe here.” Horizon Wellness Center. I’ve been staying here for a few months and even though a twinge of de ja vu happens… no memories.
“This just feels… strange?” A nurse at a desk only feet away smiles warmly. Jolie tucks her long hair behind an ear and wraps her arms around my arm after letting go of my hand.
I let Jolie lead me down the hallway to my room. The thought of being in a small, closed off space makes panic set in. I pull away from her and tell her that I’d like to see Dr. Vargas.
“You will. You have an appointment tomorrow with her.” Jolie’s eyes squint at me for second, before she laughs and then smiles. “You can talk to me, if you want.” I can’t talk to her. There was an unmistakable shift when my nightmares became more… physical in nature. I can barely look at Jolie. I feel dirty and disgusting.
“Keir, the FBI has recruited me. Did I tell you that?” She looks proud of herself. “They wanted me, for work they’re doing on the psychology of interrogations. It’s because I’m at the top of my class. I’m only telling you this, so you know that you can trust me, I’ll be working for the FBI.” She twists to the side and stamps her feet like she can’t contain her excitement. It only makes me feel… grossed out. Where did the sensitive and sweet girl I first met at the hospital go? I make a pained face before I can stop myself.
“Are you having head pain?” she asks and takes one of my hands.
“Uhh… I’m going to rest.” The last thing I want to do is close myself into this room, but I want to get away from Jolie. “Thank you for picking me up from the hospital.”
“Oh… of course, we’re friends.” She promises to be back later, and I tell myself I won’t feel so ‘off’ about her and everything else after I rest. I haven’t been sleeping well because the nightmares are almost debilitating.
The room looks like a hotel. I don’t have many belongings in the dresser or closet space. One picture is taped to the wall near the bed. When I recognize the picture of dad, mom, and me at Disneyland before our lives were turned upside down, I collapse on the bed in silent tears. What do I have to live for? I reach into my pocket and clasp the thread and beads from an old bookmark of my mom’s.
My hands are wrapped around a throat, pressing… pressing, cutting off the airflow. I hear someone in the darkness, “Make her stop. That’s right… she attacked you. She tried to kill you.” I bring my hand up and touch the side of it. It comes away with blood.
I look down and see the face of my attacker and her blonde head of curls. Her mouth picks up on one side in a sneer at me. Her blue eyes holding wrath. Why? Why did she attack me?
Before I can ask, I hear my mom’s voice, “Just go along to get along. Okay?” I look around me in the dark room. Where is she? When I look back down the blonde woman is no longer there and I fall face down onto the bed. I roll over and she’s standing over me.
“Saaaammmm…,” she sings out to me in a chilling voice. “Stop me or I’ll take it all away… all of them.”
I wake up choking and coughing. My face wet with tears. Why am I having these nightmares? Have I had them for years? Who is this woman I keep seeing in them? Maybe I should just confide in Jolie because I can’t take much more of this.
Walking around the Center, a lot of the people here seem to know me and say hi. Jolie finds me sitting at the back of the Center on a bench, staring off into space. “Feeling a bit better after some sleep?” She has an even more revealing pink dress on than earlier in the day and I avert my gaze.
“I’ve been having nightmares.”
“Oh, no. Keir, that’s so awful. Do you want to tell me what they’re about?” Not really, but I’m so tired.
“I keep seeing the same blonde woman. Over and over. I don’t know her, but she wants to hurt me.” I scrub my hands down my face. “I had a nightmare that I was strangling her.”
Jolie nods. “I know why.”
My heart kicks up. “You do?”
“Oh, honey.” She places her hand on my lower back. “You’re seeing the face of the person that attacked you. Hit you in the head.” She lays her head against my arm, and I try not to jerk away.
“How… how do you know that?” I swallow and take a quick glance at her.
“She’s one of the other graduate students. You were found in her room. I didn’t want to tell you this, but there’s video of her hitting you in the back of the head with a laptop.” When I peek back her way she’s frowning and shaking her head. “She’s deeply disturbed.”
“Do the police know that?” I straighten up and look back towards the pond.
“No. But you should talk to them.” She moves closer to me and rubs her chest against my arm. “She’s dangerous and we don’t want her to return here to the Wellness Center.”
“We?” A chill moves through me. Why do I feel like something isn’t right about what she’s saying to me.
“Oh… no, I mean you. You don’t want her to come back here.”
“Where is she?” I move forward on the bench and away from Jolie, she’s suffocating me. A memory flashes through my mind of my hands around the same blonde’s throat. She’s moaning and calling my name, “Keir. Harder. Press harder.” I shut my eyes and shake my head. What’s happening to me?
