My eyes ease, but I remain silent, not wanting to tell him that I do not feel beautiful at all, and he continues.
“I remember when I first saw you. You were only sixteen.”
A shy, small smile creeps over my lips at the thought of him seeing me at that age and how nerdy I was.
“I bet you thought what the fuck?"
He lifts his head with a chuckle.
“I was twenty-two or twenty-three, so I didn’t have any kind of sexual attraction toward you at the time because you were too young for me, but I did think you were pretty. You were clearly an introvert. Quiet. Reserved. A loner.”
My brows rise as I smile a little; there is no denying that was exactly who I was.
“It wasn’t until I saw you interacting with others at my party that it really hit me how difficult everything was going to be and then at my pool the next day, it made it even fucking harder.”
My brows pinch as I respond.
“Why? You didn’t know me, and I was someone you were supposed to hate.”
His eyes ease and they drop to my lips before he elevates his chin.
“Yet you were fucking perfect for me in every way, Lil Chaos. You had grown into this beautiful young woman with long, dark hair and olive-green siren eyes that I could not stop thinking about. You were exactly what I wanted in a girl.”
My eyes explore his face as I move my palms to his shoulders while he continues.
“Yeah, your beauty caught my attention initially, but do you remember when you came into my bedroom when the lights cut out?”
I smile slightly before I nod.
“Yeah, and you blew your joint into my mouth and forced me to cuddle you until the lights came back on.”
He chuckles before shaking his head, his eyes moving away for a few seconds before they meet them again.
“That was the moment I realized I was fucked. You were distinctive. It wasn’t about the money. The fame. Sex. Drugs. Music or who the hell I was and what you could gain. You rejected my ass. You weren't like anyone I had ever met. You dismissed everything and saw me for who the fuck I was, not what I had transformed into for everybody else when I got on stage. You overlooked the chaos, and more than anything, it’s what I really craved after years of being famous.”
My face falls as I think about it for a moment before I respond quietly.
“That’s because that is all I wanted in return. I went my entire life not truly being accepted for the strange girl I was, but you and Reign changed that for me.”
He shakes his head, his eyes closed.
“Maybe if we didn’t do what we did, your life would have been different. You would not have isolated yourself so much and—”
I feel a pang of sorrow in my heart as he glances away.
“Yeah, what you both did wasn’t right, Chaos, I’m not going to lie to you, what you did was fucked, but I think we all know deep down that what has happened between the three of us was genuine and to be honest, you guys weren’t the cause of why I was who I was.”
He looks down at me and I continue peering deep into his eyes, running my palms up his strong back.
“You both stalking and taunting me brought me more comfort than fear, believe me. I spent my whole life without family and friends before you guys came in and made me believe I was loved. It brought me calm, and I felt cherished, even if you did not mean it.”
His eyes soften and he strokes my hair.
“That is far from the truth. Reign and I both knew it. We knew deep down that you would be ours for real. We had been following you for a long fucking time, and it was clear that we were going to grow attached. Our fathers screwed up big time getting us involved with you."
I tilt my head and bring my palm to the side of his neck.
"Everything happened for a reason, even though it seems strange right now. You guys proved yourselves worthy of forgiveness the instant you rescued me, which is why we are here. You both chose me over everything, Chaos, including family and what they believe in, even though you didn't have to."
