I take a seat on the small, velvet stool, reaching out for a pack of cigarettes. As I pull one from the box, I notice her behind me in the mirror, but she is still gawking. While my eyes are locked on her, I light the end and take a deep pull. She returns her focus to me, lowering her box beside her and she finally starts with my hair as I smoke.
“So how have you been?”
I remain silent, not looking her way as she continues to engage with a smile on her face.
“Do you remember the day I first met you at the Lakehouse and we all played—”
My eyes snap to hers in the reflection, memories flooding through my mind of how Chaos licked her throat during dirty tequila shots, but by the end of the night he fucked me hard in front of Reign. Memories I try to leave in the back of mind, but memories that now feel precious, my only thing remaining ofmy time with Chaos. She senses my intense stare and cuts off immediately, refocusing on doing my hair in a pretty updo.
“I am now engaged to Beau.”
My brows rise as I lower my eyes and she continues.
“We all had it pretty tough when Chaos died, but Reign really brought us together.”
My heart swells at the thought of him finding his purpose. Maybe knowing he could not heal me made him reconsider those close to him which only brings me happiness. I lift my eyes carefully as I inhale deeply.
“How has he been?”
Her eyes meet mine in the mirror when I speak before she gives a small nod.
“He seems to be doing okay, finally. He is now head of the Bratva and that is where his focus has mainly been.”
My brows crease in uncertainty.
“And his father?”
She shakes her head once, not saying anything in words, but letting me know he is dead, likely from Reign killing him since I knew he was trying to find him after Chaos was killed.
“I’m sure you will see him at the wedding.”
I keep my eyes low, watching the smoke of my cigarette floating upward in spirals, lost in my own thoughts.
“I will be going later tonight with Beau, so maybe I will see you there.”
I continue to ignore her throughout the time she is here until she says something that attracts my attention.
“This tattoo on the back of your neck is beautiful.”
As I glance at my reflection, observing the finishing touches on my hair, memories flood back of the scar on the back of my neck that someone had pointed out in Boston when I had my hair up. Maddox's cruel mark was a reminder of the horrors I endured. Chaos had brushed it off when I asked since he obviously wanted to protect my battered state of mind, but I learned the truth later: Maddox had carved the letter M into my skin.
It was a sign of his twisted dominance, a scar I could not bear to carry any longer. So, I took control and last month as soon as I could, I walked into a tattoo parlor and had a black swan inked over the scar, reclaiming my body and defying Maddox's hold over me.
It was an act of empowerment, a symbol of my strength in overcoming the darkness. That is why I have chosen to wear my hair up today. I want everyone to know who I am when I enter that wedding and see exactly what I have become in their harsh world—what they have shaped me to be in the cruelest of ways, but I remain unbroken by it. Although I am not claiming my crown, I have become someone who naturally runs through my veins: Swan Morozov. Queen of the NYC Russian Mafia.
Among Nana’s possessions was the letter that I did not finish reading because Maddox found me. But it turns out, because I am the queen, I was not rightfully promised to Maddox. I did have a voice after all; I could have chosen any Mafia man in the city, as long as he was Russian. So, all the suffering I endured at the hands of that monster was for nothing.
I am not sure who knows of these revelations, but I can almost guarantee Chaos and Reign’s fathers did the entire time. I could have married Chaos or Reign and brought more power to their families, yet I was doomed for destruction by blood feuds. I was forced into Maddox's hands when I did not need to be there in the first place.
Discovering the truth was the final stab for me. It made me realize that I do not want anything to do with this world. How could I rule over a realm so cruel and inhumane toward innocent people? To women? How could I stand there, dictating to these powerful families that are so full of hatred and revenge? How could I have my children be raised around such evilness? It was an awakening to the harsh reality of the life I had been born into.
When it seems like Lana is finished, she takes a step away, positioning a handheld mirror behind me to see the back.
“How about this?”
My dark hair is in a beautifully styled updo, coiled in an elegant pattern adorned with shimmering diamonds. Long, curly strands frame my face, but what matters most is the drawn attention to the bold tattoo of a swan displayed on the back of my neck for the world to see.
I give her a small nod of approval and she withdraws, getting her belongings together as I stand from the stool to see her out. We walk to the door together and she turns to face me once we get there.
