“Ex-fucking-cuse me? Have you forgotten about your own scars? When the hell did you start passing judgment? What the fuck, E?” I seethe with fury.
He releases a defeated sigh before turning to face me, his expression remaining neutral as our eyes lock in a silent battle. In that moment, it dawns on me, and I cross my arms over my chest, knowing the reason behind his behaviour.
“Is this about other men? You do realize what a circus dancer dresses like, right? This is not the time to get jealous now, E, it was your idea to come here!”
His eyes ease, taking a step forward until his hands find my shoulders. “Of course not. I just worry about you that’s all.” He says softly.
I analyse his features, still irritated because I know I am right.
He stands straight, releasing my shoulders with a sluggish movement before his rubs his eyes with his finger and thumb.
“Look, it’s just been a long fucking day. I am going to get the truck, take my meds and get some sleep.”
I remain silent as he walks away, my gaze following him until he exits the room. The sound of the trailer door opening and closing echoes through, and I release a tense breath, feeling a mix of frustration and confusion within me.
What the hell? I secured us a place to stay, made sure we'd be fed, and found an opportunity to make money just as he wanted, and he is being like this? I hope he is just tired, because this is not like him at all. Never has Eli had a problem with my scars being on show, so why the sudden change?
Alone in the living room, I pass the time watching the small TV mounted on the wall. Eli has gone to bed as he said he would, without saying a single word to me when he returned from getting the truck.
Despite it being past midnight, my restless energy refuses to let me sleep. Starting to crave fresh air to clear my mind, I rise from the couch, throwing on my black hoodie, and slip into my black, high-top Converse. As soon as I am ready, I approach the door and gently pull it open, stepping out into the crisp night air, the coolness hitting the exposed skin on my legs.
After closing the door softly behind me, trying not to make a sound, I adjust my tattered, blue shorts, tugging them downward. I glance around, ready to explore the trailer park, then I start taking steps forward. I weave through the narrow spaces between the small homes, my eyes scanning the dark surroundings for any signs of life, until I suddenly spot a young woman appearing from one of the trailers.
My steps slow as our gazes meet, and there is a silent exchange between us. She is striking, with long, black hair with bright pink tips, and her curvaceous figure is outlined by her tight, all-in-one black jumpsuit.
After some time of staring, her expression transforms into a wide, cheerful smile, and she begins to skip toward me with a playfulness. As she comes closer, a sense of curiosity mingled with caution runs through me. When she stops in front of me with a leap, my gaze widens slightly, realizing she has pink eye contacts in.
“Hey! What are you doing here, beautiful? You shouldn’t be here.” She asks with a big grin.
I pull my hood over my head, letting my long blonde hair spill out in front of me as I respond. “I’m new here.”
Her gasp is loud, filled with excitement as her smile spreads even more. “Holy fucking shit! Are you a new dancer?”
As soon as I nod, she snatches my arm, intertwining hers with mine, and I feel her vibrant energy pulsating through her touch. She pulls me forward, then she skips beside me merrily.
“You MUST meet everyone!”
I stumble, attempting to keep up with her long strides, “Everyone?” I respond.
“Yes! We all meet up at the campfire in the woods any time after midnight most nights.” She leans in, suddenly being quiet but keeping her smile. “Well, the younger group. The elders are fucking boring.”
As we start entering the dense woods that encircle the circus and carnival, I can't help but think about Eli back at the trailer, fast asleep and missing out on the opportunity to meet everyone, but I tell myself that there will be more chances for him to join us if this is a regular thing.
As we trek deeper into the darkness, the glow of a distant light catches my eye, drawing us closer and the girl beside me peppers me with questions. “So, what’s your name and what dance do you do?”
“My name is Noir and I do just about everything dance wise.” I reply.
I turn to look at her, and her curious gaze is already fixed on me, close to my face, a creepy wide smile still stretched across her lips. As we continue our conversation, I can't shake the feeling that there is something more to her demeanor and I begin to wonder if she might be fucking high, or if this could just be her bizarre personality.
“What’s your name and what do you do?” I ask.
She appears ecstatic when I say the words and we both look forward, the campfire becoming closer. “I’m Blush. I am a fire breather and dancer.” She answers with proudness.
I look at her with wide eyes, instantly admiring what she does. “Wow, I can’t wait to see you at work. I would love to know how to do that.”
She squeezes my arm a little tighter into her side. “Well, maybe I will teach you one day, Noir.”
As we step into the clearing, the chatter among the group gradually fades to silence, all eyes turning towards us. The campfire casts a flickering glow across the faces of the young men and women, some still decorated with face paint, others bare like myself. Each one has a unique personality in their styles of outfits and their dark gazes lock on me, expressions ranging from confusion to intrigued.
