Jace had given strict orders: “If she blinks wrong, kill her.” Andthatone looked like the type to indeedcountthe blinks. So, I stood right there, still as a damn statue, the fantasy playing behind my eyes, even though I knew better than to speak it out loud.
The earlier treatment from Jace played on an endless loop in my head.
It was as if I was a complete stranger to him instead of somebody who once knew the sound of his laugh, the way his voice dropped when he was irritated, or how he used to stare at me when he thought I wasn’t paying attention. The man I witnessed that day felt like a completely different person. He was colder, harder, and angrier, like life had carved pieces out of him and replaced them with steel. Perhaps the transformation was the aftermath of everything that had transpired.
I was almost sure he was probably still upset with me—maybe even hurt—and was trying to punish me a little before finally admitting who he really was.I’ll give him time to get over what I did. Not forever, though, but enough time to come back to me on his own.Then again… maybe part of the problem was my appearance.
Ten years locked away from the world had changed me more than I realized. My hair alone had grown ridiculously long, thick, and uneven from years of trimming it myself in dusty bathroom mirrors with dull scissors and impatience.
Zonnique was a woman of her word, and she reserved an entire day to “get me right,” starting with a trip to the hair salon. The stylist washed my hair three different times, deep-conditioned it, and styled it into a sleek pixie cut that somehow made me look whole again. Then came the waxing, nails, brows, skincare routines, and long lectures from Zonnique about moisturizing properly like dry skin was a criminal offense.
Re-entering society as a woman felt exhausting.
Instead of taking me on some giant shopping spree, though, Zonnique just went shopping for me herself. The bitch probably didn’t want to risk being seen in public with me maybe because she realized that after the makeover, I somehow came out prettier than her and that irritated her a little. Be that as it may, she insisted I needed “outside clothes.” Apparently oversized hoodies, stretched-out leggings, and unresolved trauma weren’t considered a fashion aesthetic.
As impatience clawed at me, I wondered what could be taking so long upstairs.
I was dying to know what they were talking about. Whatever it was, it must’ve gone south, because minutes later Zonnique stomped down the stairs like the devil had stepped on her Louboutin’s.
“Let’s go!” she snapped, aggressively jerking her purse strap higher onto her shoulder.
“Okay…” I said softly, immediately falling into step behind her like a trained dog trying not to get yelled at.
Once we slid into the car and the engine roared to life, I hesitated before turning slightly toward her.
“Everything alright?”
Instantly, her nostrils flared, colored with indignation. “No! That muthafucka and his damn mouth, I swear! The nigga’s got all this money, power, is fine as hell, with great dick, and he still talks to people like he was raised in a damn cage fighting pitbulls!”
My eye twitched uncontrollably as my fingers curled tightly in my lap.
This bitch got one more time to speak on Jace’s dick like I’m not sitting here.
I didn’t want to hear about my man’s body being shared like a community meal.
A voice began whispering cruelly in my head, swirling with malice.
Look at you—pregnant, confused, and still chasing a ghost that won’t even claim you anymore… or maybe he genuinely doesn’t know who the fuck you are anymore. Meanwhile, he’s probably touching her with the same hands you keep fantasizing about. Ain’t that embarrassing?
Sometimes the voices knew how to torment me in silence and loved making me feel stupid.
Shut up! He remembers me! I saw it in his eyes!
Girl, please. You said the same thing about that male nurse at Willowgate because he brought you two extra graham crackers and remembered your name.
That was different.
No, it wasn’t. You spent two whole weeks thinking that man was secretly in love with you. Whole time, he was literally paid to be nice to mentally unstable patients.
Heat surged to my cheeks as humiliation and anger blended.
He did like me... a little,I protested weakly.
And this is exactly why nobody trusts your judgment now,the voice hissed.Because from the outside, this doesn’t look like destiny. It looks like you’re slowly losing your damn mind again.
Tears burned behind my eyes instantly.
I’m not crazy!
