My heart beats a little faster and grows warm.
After he leaves, Caden claims Harper so I can clean up. When I’m done, I help clean Harper. When we step out, Eli takes her hand and leads her to the tub. He settles in it first and she lowers down to rest against his chest.
Do I think I could take care of Harper on my own? Probably. But it wouldn’t be nearly as fun, and I doubt she would have put up with my shit in the beginning without the others. I’m happy we’re here in our relationship.
Now to figure out how to make everyone else stay out of it.
CHAPTER 63
The Double Cross
Harper
I draw in a breath and sink into the heat of the bath and against Eli. His legs fall on either side of me. We’re all alone in the bathroom now. Luke closed the door on his way out.
“How are your arms and legs?” He strokes his hands up and down my arms.
I rest my head against his chest and sigh. “A little achy, but not bad. Being bound let me pay attention more, since I didn’t worry about where my hands or legs were.”
“Did you like that, kitten?” His voice is soothing.
“I enjoyed it. Is that weird?” I turn my head to look up at him. “Am I supposed to enjoy being used?”
He drags his wet finger along my jaw as he searches my eyes. “Did you feel used?”
I let myself consider the question. “I don’t think any of you were doing it only for your pleasure. You all made sure I got off too.”
“We should talk about this more, kitten. Especially when you’ve had time to process it. What we’re doing isn’t for everyone. If you ever feel unsafe or like you have to do something just to please us, you should talk to us about it.”
A smile crosses my lips, and I turn to look at him more fully. “That’s not something you would have said when we first started.”
He smirks and his dark eyes sparkle. “We were being very vanilla at first.”
“I don’t know howvanillagroup sex is.” I arch an eyebrow. “Especially for a virgin.”
He smooths the stray hairs away from my face and his look turns thoughtful. “I won’t apologize for how we came after you. How we pushed your limits. All of our shared history leads us to here. To you in my arms, knowing you are loved by five men and loving us in return.”
“Eli—”
“Harper, you couldn’t know what you wanted then because you didn’t have any experience. But now you do.”
I don’t say anything, but watch him, wondering what he’s going to tell me. His brow furrows, and he holds my chin so our eyes are locked.
“You didn’t say your safe word when we all felt you had enough. Maybe your limits are much higher than we’ll ever take you, but it also scares me you won’t use it. That you’ll let us blow past those limits and really hurt you physically, emotionally, or mentally. I don’t want that to happen.”
He rests his forehead against mine. “So, later, you and I will have a discussion after you’ve had time to process what you went through tonight. You and I will decide whether to keep this in play or come back to it at a later time or adjust it. Whatever you need to make you feel safe is what we’ll do.”
I turn and straddle his lap, sloshing the water around us, but I need to face him when I say this. I cup his jaw and search his eyes. “I love you. I love that you’re willing to check in with me. I promise to say my safe word when I need it. I promise to alwaystalk to you about what I’m experiencing. I love that you care about me that way.”
“If I wanted a sex doll, they aren’t that expensive and a lot less hassle.” Eli grabs my ponytail gently. “I wantyou, Harper. This living, breathing, thinking, stunning woman. I want to nurture your enthusiasm for sex and creativity without putting you in a dangerous situation. If you think something might push your limits, we need to discuss it first.” Eli brings his lips against mine. “I love you, kitten.”
He tastes my lips softly before deepening the kiss. I surrender to him, wrapping my arms around his neck and giving in to this crazy lightness in my chest that says everything’s going to be okay because they love me.
We kiss and soak and talk a little more about nothing important before Eli finally says we need to get out of the bath. When we dry each other off, I feel whole. I wrap a towel around my body while he drapes his around his waist.
“I need to brush my teeth.” I gesture and move toward the sink.
He kisses my temple and releases me with a sigh. “I need to get back to work.”
