I couldn’t really remember why I’d settled for him, except he’d asked, and I’d been so sad about so many things, I’d said yes. The night before our wedding, when I’d had too many doubts to ignore, I’d been on the edge of backing out.
Then Cormac had to go activate my stupid, stubborn pride.
If not for overhearing that conversation, I would ha—
“Hey! Is everyone dressed? I’m here.”
My knife paused midslice.
As if I’d conjured him by thinking about him for the second time in as many days, Cormac strolled into the kitchen, devastating me right down to my toes.
It wasn’t how much older he looked, or how ridiculously handsome he was in his navy-blue suit, or even the way his thick brown waves fell almost to his shoulders.
The moment his pale-blue eyes landed on me, the light vanished, and his easy smile turned off like a switch had been flipped.
All because I was standing in his parents’ kitchen.
He couldn’t even hide how much he didn’t want me here.
I’d never been able to figure out what I’d done to make him hate me this much, but my stupid, stubborn pride had been reactivated.
This summer I’d find out.
Come hell or high water.
Chapter Six
Cormac
The Past…
“It’sbad,Maccie.”
I gripped the phone, wishing I could shove myself through it so it was her hand I was holding instead. “I’m here. Tell me.”
Zara sniffled, her breath shuddering. “They won’t tell us the truth. I know they’re pretending it’s not as dire as it seems. But cancer is bad enough, right? She has to have surgery. Like, right away. And I—”
I heard her panic. I understood it. If it were my mom, I didn’t know how I’d handle it. As it was, I was choking back tears. Zadie Vasquez was the nicest woman I’d ever met. She didn’t deserve this. But I couldn’t get lost in my own feelings. Zara needed me to be strong for her. I had to be the person she could lean on.
“Your dad won’t let anything happen to her. He’s got the best doctors, doesn’t he?”
What did I know? I was almost eighteen and had lived in the same small town my whole life. But I spoke like I knew everything because she needed to hear it. It made me feel better to say it too, even if we both knew it was only wishful thinking.
“Yeah. I think so. He doesn’t sleep, and he’s always making calls. I think my mom’s more worried for him than herself, which is crazy.” She let out a wet, humorless laugh. “If she dies, I don’t think he’ll survive it.”
“She’s not going to die, Z.”
“You don’t know that,” she whispered.
“I do. I’m sure of it.”
She didn’t say anything for a long moment then sucked in a ragged breath. “Can you keep talking to me? Tell me something good. Anything, Maccie. Just don’t hang up.”
“I won’t hang up. Promise.”
Seeing her shouldn’t have hurt like this. It’d been so long, so many years since we were friends…since she was the most important person in the world to me. We’d barely been more than kids, but dear god, I couldn’t even pretend seeing Zara wasn’t a direct punch to the gut.
I slipped my balled hands in my pockets. “Oh. Hi.”
