CAMILE
The party isin full swing when we arrive.
It took me ages to dress for it. I wanted to feel sexy and strong, but a small voice in the back of my mind kept second guessing myself the whole time. I have this fear now that Jack thinks I’m some sort of epic slut.
Ever since I got the thought in my head, I can’t shake it off.
I’m not the sort of person to dress for a man, but tonight, I have. Forfourmen. I would be lying if I said I didn’t consider every outfit I tried on with regards to how Rook, Ace, Ghost, and Jack would react to it. In the end, I went for a pair of jeans that are flared but tight around my ass and hips, with cowboy boots with a decent heel under them. I’m wearing a low-cut top that shows off my collarbones, neck, and shoulders, but in a classy, sexy-but-not-slutty way. And I have a cute shrug over it to keep me warm, even though it’s much warmer than usual for the time of year.
It’s more my style. I tried once before to dress like the women in the club, and got myself fingered by a stranger in the clubhouse for my trouble.
I’m done trying to be someone I’m not.
My hair is shiny, my face is expertly made up, and I’m wearing a simple silver choker around the base of my throat. It hasn’t passed me by that it could look like a collar, if one were so inclined. I’m hoping it appeals to the controlling, dominant side of Jack. Despite what happened earlier with Ace and Rook, I can’t stop craving the Riders’ President.
“You ready?” Ace asks as we near the crowds gathered on the grass.
Voices are raised as people laugh, shout, and trade comedic insults and jokes. The music, some sort of heavy rock, blares from speakers at the far end of the grassy area, and the aroma of barbecued food drifts over on the evening air. In the center of it all, a large bonfire cracks and pops as smoke rises in a coil.
Ace and Rook had walked me to the party, making sure I wasn’t going to turn up alone. Their eyes had drifted down my figure appraisingly, so I presume I look okay in my jeans and top.
“You look pretty,” Rook says softly as we pause before the assembled throng.
I glance at him. He’s a little paler than usual, and he’s worrying at his lower lip.
“I guess I’m not the only nervous one?” I ask.
He rams his hands deep into his pockets. “We have no idea how much people know.” He shrugs, his shoulders high.
“Jack, me, Ghost, Big Mike, and Smokie Saul are theonly ones who know exactly what happened,” Ace says. “And none of us are talking. The general club doesn’t need to know shit. It’s none of their fucking business.”
Rook’s shoulders relax a little. “Good to hear.”
It really is. I had wondered if I’d be walking into a crowd of people who knew I’d been fucked in the ass by Rook at gunpoint.
Shelley walks over to me. “Camile,” she says with a soft, pretty smile. “How are you feeling, honey?”
She’s wearing a low-cut top, and I’m jealous of her epic cleavage. Her hair is teased, and it reminds me of how women used to wear it in rock videos in the eighties. She smells of something sweet and floral, and her eyes take in my bruises with concern. The marks around my wrists make it clear I’ve been bound.
“I’m okay, thanks.”
She glances at Rook and Ace. “Boys,” she greets them.
Ace tips an imaginary cowboy hat at her, and Rook nods.
“Come over and join us ladies for a while,” Shelley suggests. “You’ve not met many of them properly, have you?”
I look toward the collection of women, who, judging from their tightknit circle, I presume are mostly ol’ ladies, and swallow hard. I won’t fit in. I’m better finding myself some sweetbutts to hang with. I’m not sure I’ll get the best reception.
“Come on.” Shelley slips her arm around my waist and squeezes gently. “You’ll be fine. We don’t bite.”
I cast a worried glance behind me to Ace, and he gives a jerk of his head with a smile. “If you’re going to be staying, might as well get to know some of the girls, and I’ll be close by. I’ll grab you a drink. What do you want?”
“I’ll take a vodka and Coke.” I need something stronger than beer because my nerves are in knots.
Shelley leads me over to the women, and I try to push past my nerves. I cast my gaze around, feeling reassured somehow when it lands on Ghost, who is watching me right back. The man feels like my silent protector. I can’t see Jack anywhere, and disappointment hits me hard.
When I reach the women, they smile at me and greet me in a chorus of exclamations, all of which hit me like a wall of sound. The panic that keeps nipping at the edges of my nerves threatens to overwhelm me. Shelley must notice because she holds her hands up.
