I consider their suggestions. As eager as I am to jump in and confront the Dark Arcana, the guys are right. We need to do this the smart way. The safe way.
“I’m with you,” I say. “We’ll do some experiments. Who wants to volunteer as first bed mate?”
Everyone raises a hand but Doc, whose eyes are blazing so hot, he’s nearly competing with the torches.
I crack up. “Okay, we’ll figure that part out later.”
Doc clears his throat. “In the meantime, I suggest we come up with a plan to search for the objects on campus. They could literally be anywhere.”
“Including,” Kirin says, “magickally hidden in or around any of the portals or other heavily warded places. It’s not going to be easy.”
“Have you guys ever looked for the objects before?” I ask. “Is there anything we can rule out?”
Kirin shakes his head. “Until very recently, we were still mostly convinced they were legends. Our focus had always been on the dark book, but now…” He trails off, and shame makes my insides burn.
“But now the books are gone,” I say. “Thanks to me.”
I close my eyes, picturing the books in Phaines’s blood-covered hands—my mother’s grimoire and the Journey to the Void of Mist and Spirit. Together, they hold the key to finding the objects—if our hypothesis is correct.
And now they’re gone.
“I shouldn’t have trusted him,” I whisper. “It’s my fault—”
“Stevie.” Kirin stands before me, his hands on my shoulders. “No. I was going to say, but now we have to accept the fact that we were wrong.Iwas wrong. Not just about the legends, but about… about a lot of things.”
His pale green eyes glow in the torchlight, and he holds my gaze for several long moments.
He’s not just talking about the objects or the dark legends.
He's talking about me. Aboutus.
I close my eyes, remembering him in the library that night, not long after Danika Lewis was executed on live television. Remembering his confession.
I just kept thinking over and over… What if something happened to me or to someone I cared about, and I never even told them how I feel? I’m falling in love with you, Stevie. And I can’t let myself do that…
A flicker of hope unfurls in my chest, but I tamp it down. I can't afford to fall into that trap again, no matter how tempting Kirin is.
Baz and I? We had a fight on All Hallow’s Eve—a bad one, one that we still need to talk about—but just a fight. Kirin? That wasn’t a fight. Kirin flat out broke my heart. I’m not saying it can never be mended, but it’s not going to happen with a few simple words and longing gazes, no matter how I still feel about him.
I give him a soft smile, then step back, turning my attention back to the others.
“Setting aside the problem of the missing books,” I say, “what do we do about the Janelle Kirkpatrick factor? She’s definitely going to be a problem.”
“We stay the fuck away from her,” Baz says, his energy turning hot and angry. “And we hope she gets bored of whatever little game she’s playing and moves on.”
“You think she will?” I ask. “She came here for a reason. And I doubt it’s because she’s always dreamed of becoming a librarian, or even because she’s worried about Carly.”
I tell the guys about my chat with Carly before class this morning.
Baz’s eyes blaze, and in the mix of his raging energy, I sense a bolt of shame. I try to focus in on it, certain I’m misinterpreting, but it’s there, clear as day.
He’s ashamed about something.
I glance up and meet his eyes, but he looks away immediately.
“I have to admit,” Doc says, “I wasn’t expecting Anna to hire a replacement so quickly. Or to call in reinforcements from APOA without looping me in. She's made our work twice as hard.”
“She knows we’re looking for the objects?” I ask.
