She nods, then taps the phone pocket at her waist. “But don’t worry. Doc had my new phone sent over this morning, so I texted Ani to let him know my exact route and timing. I’ve got the GPS thing on too, so… Yeah. Totally trackable at all times. Yay for surveillance tech!”
“It won’t always be like this,” I say softly, wishing I could make it better for her. Wishing I could find Phaines and beat the life out of him. Wishing I could do something other than wish.
“It’s fine.” She blows out a breath, a few curls popping loose from her ponytail. “I’m okay. Honestly, I wasn’t even planning to run this morning, but I didn’t sleep well last night. Figured some fresh air and a good pounding would help.”
“A good… um.” I shift on my feet, hoping my dick goes back into hiding before I hurt myself here. “Okay, I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that.”
Stevie smacks my chest. “Pavement, perv. Pounding the pavement.”
“So, did it? Help, I mean?”
Her smile fades again. “Not really.”
“See? Maybe my wayisbetter.”
“Maybe.” She laughs, but it doesn’t last.
Just as quickly as the jokes rose, the awkwardness creeps back in.
I don’t know how to do this—not with her. The awkward silences. The uncomfortableness. The blazing desire and all the unsaid shit getting between us.
We’re all walking a fine line now, trying to find a new equilibrium, some crazy balance between keeping each other safe and respecting each other’s privacy. Trust—what’s left of it—is fragile. And though Stevie took the blood oath and willingly joined our Brotherhood, the guys and I know damn well we have a lot of rebuilding to do. A lot of trust to earn back. And that takes time. Space, too.
Something I keep reminding myself, despite wanting to be close to her. Next to her. Inside her.
After everything that happened with Phaines the other night, and all the Brotherhood stuff, and the long conversations that followed, Stevie finally asked us for some privacy. She needed time to process it, she said. To deal with her own feelings on what happened with Phaines and all the new revelations we’d dropped on her—the secrets we kept from her.
I left her alone all weekend, forcing myself not to message her, not to drop by. Not to stalk her in the common room, hoping to catch sight of her as she curled up by the fireplace with whatever book she’d left behind.
This is the first I've seen Stevie in days, and her presence feels like the fucking sun on my face.
My heart jerks in my chest—a sharp ache like nothing I’ve ever felt before.
Fuck.
I take back what I told Janelle. Turns out Idoremember what it feels like to miss someone.
“Hey,” I say softly, looking into her worried eyes. “You okay? Really?”
“Yeah. No. I mean…” She smiles, her eyes misting. “I guess I’ll always be looking over my shoulder now, right? Waiting for him to show up again. To pop up out of nowhere and finish what he started.”
My blood simmers, my fists balling at my sides. “That’s not going to happen again, Stevie.”
She looks up at me with all the hope in the world, but there’s a new emotion behind her eyes now, a hard edge that wasn’t there before All Hallow’s Eve.
One more reason Phaines is going to suffer when we finally get our hands on him.
“Baz,” she says, her eyes fluttering closed. “I need to… I can’t… I’m…”
I wait for her to continue, my heart hammering, terrified and hopeful and fucking confused as hell…
But then she just opens her eyes again and laughs, and I know the moment is gone.
“I need a shower,” she says instead.
I’mthisclose to asking whether she wants some company, but I hold back. Jokes and innuendos are a lot easier when your heart’s not tangled up in it. Now, I have no idea where the fuck we stand. All Hallow’s Eve, having her in my arms, in my bed, hearing her breathy moans in my ear… damn. It was everything.
But then Carly showed up, and Stevie and I fought, and she stormed out into the night—straight into the trap Phaines had set for her.
