What Evander had endured… I couldn’t evenbeginto imagine that much pain. That much torment. My birth mother had been cruel and brutal, but I’d still had people in my life looking out for me. People who’d made sure that I was safe, that I was adopted into a loving home, that I was cared for and cherished as a child ought to be. And even though it meant being separated from my sisters, in the end, I still got them back. I still had my family.
Evander was ripped fromhisfamily, from his childhood. From Elian. He was stolen. A vulnerable child with no one there to keep him safe.
“I can’t pretend to know what you went through,” I said, pulling back to look into his eyes. “But I understand why you feel the way you do about Keradoc. Why you want to take everything from him. Why this war is so important to you.”
“Then you understand why I must leave.”
“I understand why youbelieveyou must leave, but…” I sighed and shook my head. “Your need for revenge drove you to survive, and I get that. In that situation, yes, you absolutely do whatever you can. But the problem with vengeance as a survival strategy is that it’s not good for the long haul.”
“What do you mean?”
“What happens when it’s done? Let’s say you win this war, squash Melantha and Darkwinter and all the rebel factions, claim the realm for yourself, and wipe Keradoc from the records so no one ever speaks his name again.”
“That’s the plan.”
“And what will keep you going after all that?”
“Keep megoing?” A dark laugh echoed through the cave, so cold and lifeless it made me shiver despite the roaring fire. “That’s the thing about revenge, Haley. Those who live by the sword, die by the sword.”
“That’s not an answer.”
“I don’t expect to live long enough to need one.” He turned from me again, buttoning up his shirt and crouching down to sift through his pack.
“You are fighting a war for a home you’ve got no plans to live long enough to enjoy? You’re about to leave me here alone, hike out through a storm you probably won’t survive, all because you think you need to just… keep fighting? Keep carrying out your revenge? For who, yourself? The soldiers you’re hoping will write battle hymns about you?”
“It’s not for them. Don’t be ridiculous.”
“Then for who, Evander?Who?” I demanded, my voice rising, my blood simmering as the reality crashed over me. Hewouldn’tsurvive the storm—no amount of fae magick could keep him safe. If it could, then my own fae would’ve found a way to get here by now, and we wouldn’t even be having this conversation.
“Oona isn’t your daughter,” I continued. “She’s Keradoc’s. And if you truly cared for her, you’d tell her that her real father is rotting away in your dungeon, so don’t tell me you’re doing this for her. Your guards are gone—slaughtered by your hand or fleeing out of fear that they’ll be next. Your generals remain loyal, but for how long? The minute they sense they’re fighting a losing battle, they’ll choose new sides. That’s just how this works.”
“I don’t need you to tell me about the challenges of war, Haley. I’m well aware.”
“Your entire life in Midnight is a ploy. A scheme that you plotted for a single purpose—to ruin the man who tortured you. Well, you’ve already won in that regard. Keradoc is a relic, barely clinging to life. And you say you want his realm, his magick, but you know damn well that if you walk out of this cave tonight, you’ll very likely die before you even make it a full mile, and the kingdom will be lost anyway. So you look me in the eyes and tell me, Evander of Midnight, what are youreallyfighting for?”
He stilled at his pack, every muscle in his body drawn tight, his breath held, the tension so thick I thought I might choke on it.
And then, finally, an answer. Low and dark, a whisper I could barely hear above the hissing of the flames.
“For a long time, I thought I knew,” he said. “Ididknow, Haley. With utter certainty. For decades, I planned this. And if you’d asked me the night of the Feast, I’d have told you my answer—I was fighting for the realm. The magick. And no, I would never have risked my life on a fool’s errand such as this. I would’ve sent my men to do my dirty work, while I stayed safely behind the wall, moving my chess pieces around the board as I’d always done.”
“Then what the hell changed?”
He exhaled and got to his feet. Turned to me. Closed the gap with a single, powerful step.
He raised his hands before me, and in one swift move, jerked the ring free.
Blood ran down his finger, black and viscous.
And before me, a silver-eyed fae stood in the firelight, magnificent and beautiful. Real.
“Evander,” I whispered, my throat tight with emotion, tears brimming in my eyes. He and Elian may have been identical twins, but their lives had diverged long ago, and the tragedies shaping them had altered them in small but perceptible ways. Looking at him now, it was a wonder to me that I’d ever mistaken him for Elian, even for a little while. The angles of their faces were different, and Evander’s hair retained some of its black sheen, whereas Elian’s was completely silver. Their eyes were the same shade, but in them shone such different pain, such different history.
I reached up and touched his face, my thumb sliding across his mouth.
“You asked me what changed, Haley Barnes?” He smiled beneath my touch. “A fierce, devious, beautiful little thief kissed me on the dais and turned my entire world upside-down. And every moment since that night, she’s held me captive. Every moment I’ve spent in her presence has made me question all the things I thought I believed, all the things I thought I was. And the times when she wasn’t near, she still haunted my dreams. My thoughts. My very breath. So when you ask me why I fight? Why I risk my life for a home I’ve no intention of living long enough to claim as mine?” He shook his head, a tear slipping down his cheek. “Maybe you’ve finally given me something truly worth fighting for, little thief.”
The breath rushed from my lungs, and I closed my eyes, lost in his words, his touch, his heat.
