Upon those screaming hours
Bathed in blood and breath
You will give them light, my moon
And I will give them Death.
On the last word, I pass him the final card—a pale skeleton dressed in black armor, riding a white mare through a field of bloodied corpses.
“Death,” Draegan whispers. “I will give them Death.”
“When I touched the Death card,” I say, “it felt like ice running through my veins. It was so cold and terrifying, it almost took my breath away. But just when I thought my heart might literally stop, that ice-cold touch turned warm, and again I felt that sense of calm and rightness. It lasted a minute or so, and then it was gone. Everything went back to normal, like it never happened at all. I tried touching each card again, tried calling back the visions and voices, but… nothing. It was like the line went dead. The messages stayed with me, though.”
Stock still in the chair across from me, staring at Death, Draegan is silent for so long I’m sure he’s about five seconds from flinging the cards at me and scolding me for being such a trite and terrible witch.
Just like Eloise did when I drew the Moon card on my wedding night.
But when he finally looks up at me again, his eyes aren’t mocking at all. They’re serious and contemplative.
And very,veryworried.
Chapter Seventeen
WESTLYN
“The building in this card,” Draegan says, holding up the Tower, “looks uncannily like the facility where Jude and Augustine are holding the prisoners. Right down to the number of stories, the alleyway running along the western perimeter, and the style and color of the exterior bricks.”
Goosebumps ripple across my scalp and down my arms.
“Something huge is about to go down,” I say, my voice soft before the crackling fire. “I’msupposedto be there tonight, Draegan. I’ve got a role to play, and if I don’t show up, I just know something bad’s going to happen. It’s not just the Tarot cards, either. I can feel it in my gut.”
“I don’t doubt it, but if something bad is on the horizon, perhaps you’re being warned to stay as far away from it as possible. In fact, that would be my vote, all things considered.”
“Your vote shouldn’t count more than mine.”
Draegan lets out an exasperated sigh. “Why do you insist on throwing yourself into danger? First with the Archmage and his wife at dinner—a stunt that almost got you kidnapped. Then you practically begged me to put you in touch with Eloise, and now this? I’m sorry. I don’t doubt your intuition or your divinations, but I can’t in good conscience let you do this.”
Passing the cards back to me, he downs the last of his drink and returns his attention to Architectural Digest.
But screwthat. I’ve come too far to back down now.
Shooting to my feet and ripping the magazine out of his hands, I say, “The night those guys tied me to the tracks and basically left me for dead? That was the night I met my ravens. They saved my life, Draegan. And when I finally got out of that torture chamber, I looked up at the few stars visible in the city sky—stars I didn’t think I’d ever see again—and made two promises. One, that I’d always look after my new companions—that wherever I ended up, I’d protect and help them, just like they protected and helped me. And two—”
“Wait, don’t tell me. You’d paint a target on your back and march down Broadway with a bullhorn, calling out to your enemies and—”
“Two,” I grind out. “I vowed that for as long as I still drew breath in this body, I’dneverlet anyone make me feel powerless again. And while I’ve taken excellent care of my birds, I’m ashamed to say I haven’t been so great at keeping my second promise. The promise I made tome.”
Draegan rubs his eyebrows and sighs again. “Miss Avery, I didn’t mean—”
“The Archmage, Hunter, my own father and stepmom… They’realltrying to make me feel powerless. They’ve been doing it my whole life, and you know what? I let them. You ask me why I insist on throwing myself into danger? Because sitting back and avoiding it is what got me into this mess in the first place. For nearly twenty-three years, I let everyone else call the shots and tell me what to do because I was too scared and naïve to know there was another way. I followed their orders without pushing back because I was told by all manner of adults—on a daily basis from the moment I could understand words—that I was lucky my father didn’t abandon me to the wolves. That I needed to shut up and be grateful he was willing to take care of me. That I was a burden no father should’ve had to bear. I truly believed that my lack of magic—a thing I had absolutely zero control over—meant I didn’t deserve to have a voice in my own life. I let them convince me I was completely worthless—not just as a witch, but as a human being.”
“Nothingcould be further from the truth,” he says adamantly.
“You’re right. And for the first time, I actually believe it, too. Here’s the big secret, Draegan. The key to life. All you need is one person in your corner—just one person who’s ride-or-die for you, come what may. But if you don’t have that? You can be yourownone person. Yourownride-or-die. That means you believe in your damn self and cheer yourself on and when shit gets really hard, you don’t fucking back down. When I first fled that wedding, I was terrified of leaving my family. But I’ve come farther in these past few weeks with you guys than I have in the twenty-some years before, and Irefuseto bail on myself now. Just because I’m not physically powerful like a gargoyle, or magically powerful like an Archmage, that doesn’t mean I can’t fight for what I believe in or stick up for myself or fucking pay attention when my gut isscreamingat me to show up for the guys I care about, even if I don’t know exactly why. So yeah, fine, you might be able to stop me this time, because I don’t have a car and I’m not about to hitch a ride with bloodsuckers. Maybe you’ll stop me next time, too, and the time after that. But you can’t keep me locked up forever. One of these nights, I’m going to find a way to get out there and fully reclaim what I lost on the tracks that night, and you guys won’t be able to protect me from that. I won’t let you, because that’s mine, and I fucking earned it.”
By the time I get it all out, I’m panting like a dog and my heart is thundering like the storm in the Tower card and Draegan is just staring at me openmouthed, his eyes shining with something that looks a lot like wonder.
The fire pops and hisses, the air between us electrified, my whole body wired.
