“That won’t happen. They have nothing on me that will stick. Now tell me the real reason you’re scared of wanting me as much as you do.”
I exhaled, hating that he could dig beneath my exterior and expose my deepest vulnerabilities. That I’d never been enough for anyone to stick around. My parents always said their separation was a mutual decision, but as a child it felt like mypapiabandoned us. He stayed in Rome, and we moved on. Friendships never lasted because we moved around so much. Mum died. It wasn’t her fault, but it still felt like I’d been left behind. And my relationships always ended in betrayal or with me walking away because I’d had enough of being treated like less than I deserved. I was better off alone. That way, no one could hurt me. But for some reason, when I was given the chance to run from this man, I couldn’t. Which meant I’d just given him permission to hurt me the most.
“I have a hard time… trusting this. We burn so hot, Santino. What if it fades? What if you realise I’m not worth all this trouble and get bored with me? And by then, I’ll have given you my heart,” I sighed. “I’m not sure I’m going to survive you.”
He stayed silent for a while, thinking over my words. Just when I thought he didn’t have an answer or a way to reassure me, he shifted behind me, forcing me to sit up and face him.
“You’ll always be worth the trouble, and I’ll never get bored of you. How can I when you’re the air I fucking breathe? I don’t want you to survive me, Aria,” he husked, his dark eyes sweeping over my face, taking in every detail. “I want you toliveby my side. For me. As I will for you. You just have to trust me. Don’t be scared to give me your heart. It will be in the safest, most protective hands. I’ll never do anything to hurt you.”
I should have known he’d give me the perfect answer. “Not being scared of opening my heart to you isn’t easy, Sani. Maybe for you, because you aren’t scared of anything, but for me—”
He scoffed, shaking his head. “You think I’m not scared of anything?”
“You don’t seem scared of anything.”
He licked his lips, sliding back against the tub and holding my gaze. “I’m no stranger to fear, Aria. I used to have violent night terrors when I was little. I’d constantly dream that the men who killed mypapiwould break into our house and murder the rest of my family. I couldn’t sleep alone for two years.” Hechuckled sadly, leaning his head back and staring at the ceiling. “Mammabought me a ‘magic’ racing car bed and told me I could race away from the bad dreams and into only good ones. It worked eventually. Fears have a way of evolving. I grew up not only watching my own back every time I stepped out of my family’s secure gates but also Raya’s. She never left my side when we were kids, so I took on the role of her protector. I feared more for her life than anyone else’s, including my own.” He dipped his chin, and our eyes locked again. “Now that I’m an adult, I have different fears. I’m scared of the dayMammawon’t remember me at all. I was scared you’d leave me last night after you saw a glimpse of the darkness in me. I’m scared you’ll never trust me enough with your heart when all I want to do is live in yours.”
I pressed my lips together, fighting back the emotions at seeing his vulnerability shining through. Witnessing something I knew few would ever see. He entwined his hand with mine under the water and tugged it, pulling me back to him, this time chest to chest.
“I know I may act it,” he continued, giving me a lopsided smirk, but his eyes held all his emotion. “But I’m not invincible.”
Without warning, I kissed him. The overwhelming urgency to comfort and reassure him that I was in this too forced the fear away. When his hands slid into my hair and he deepened the kiss, I moaned. We took our time, tasting each other and melting into the kiss as though the world around us didn’t matter. But eventually it caught up with us.
Sani’s phone started ringing somewhere in the bedroom. He groaned, refusing to tear his lips away from mine as I wrapped my hand around his hard dick, stroking it leisurely under the water. The phone stopped, then started again.
“Ignore it,” he demanded as I broke the kiss and glanced towards the bedroom door. He captured my lips again, but when the relentless ringing wouldn’t stop, he threw his head back, gritting his teeth.
“Looks like someone wants you nearly as much as I do,” I murmured against his throat, kissing down the thick, veiny column while I flicked his piercing with my thumb. He let out a feral groan of frustration, and I giggled. I think I found my new favourite hobby. Teasing him.
“No, someone wants to cease to exist,” he growled, forcing himself out of the tub on the fourth incoming call. He grabbed a towel, slung it around his waist, and gave me a pointed look, dark with promise. “Wait there, beautiful. We’re not done.”
I sank beneath the bubbles, grinning like a fool when he answered the phone with blunt aggression.
“Si?”he snapped. “No. I was taking a bath with my wife. What’s wrong?”
There was silence, and I cocked my head, trying to listen more closely.
“What do you mean ‘you’re here’?” The shock in his voice made me sit up. “Alright. I’m coming.” He hung up and poked his head around the bathroom door, an apologetic look already in place. “My sisters and brother-in-law are here.”
“What?” I gasped as he handed me a towel. “In Rome?”
“In our living room because they’ve let themselves in.”
“They can do that? I thought you had security!”
“Don Alessio Barbieri answers to no one,Bella. They answer to him.”
I froze. Alessio Barbieri? I’d heard mypapimention that name. He was the top dog, the Mafia King of Italy, as they called him. He was here? I thought he lived in Sicily. All the colour must have drained from my face, because Sani chuckled, wrapped his arm around my waist, and lifted me out of the bath.
“Don’t look so worried. He’s a big softy beneath the bite.” He kissed me, then stormed out of the bathroom and into the dressing room, throwing on some smart trousers and a shirt. “Take your time, get dressed, and come and meet them. Elle hasn’t stopped messaging me about you, and it seems she’s tired of waiting. Impatience runs in the family.” He winked at me as he did the last few buttons on his shirt, then sauntered out of the room to greet them.
The shock wore off, but the nerves didn’t. I raced to my side of the dressing room and sifted through my clothes to work out what to wear. The mafia always wore suits, right? What about the women? Were they always dressed just as formally? Fuck, I had no idea. I’d only met some of them at our wedding, and they were dressed to kill. No pun intended.
I grabbed one of my favourite cute yet casual sea-green dresses with long sleeves and a short ruffled skirt. I brushed my hair and applied some quick makeup. I hated feeling flustered, but it made me realise how much I cared what his family thought of me. Now that I was choosing to stay as his wife, I wanted to make a good impression. Definitely a better one than the one I made on our wedding day.
Brushing my hands down my dress nervously, I stopped before walking around the corner into the living room and heard their voices speaking in rapid Italian. They were discussing Cecilia and what had happened last night.
“Did Arianna really manage to calm her down?” one of his sisters asked, but I didn’t know which.
