“But… this is your life, Raya! Do you honestly want to marry a complete stranger? A dangerous Russian heir you’ve never met? He might treat you terribly, and you might never love him. You’d have to leave Italy and your family. How can you be okay with that?”
“Because it means my family will be safe. So I am more than okay with it.” She picked a flower from the bush and twisted it in her hands. “I’m a twenty-nine-year-old woman who has never been kissed, Aria. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m not the most extroverted of people.” She smiled sadly at me. “I’m not allowed on dating apps, and I’ll never meet a man in a bar or supermarket. The only men I’ve ever interacted with are my family or men paid to protect me. My prospects are fairly slim. If my brothers had their way, I’d stay in this house all my life and die a virgin. So even if marrying for power is not what I pictured for my future, at least it’s not that.”
“It’s still insane,” I argued, shaking my head.
“Maybe. But who knows, I might fall in love. Crazier things have happened. And even if I don’t, I’ll have children to love, eventually.”
I stared at her, still unable to understand how she could be so relaxed and at ease with it. She didn’t even seem to have a single doubt or fear about what it could mean. I admired her courage and the love she had for her family, but no matterhow composed she appeared, I couldn’t help but feel overwhelmed with guilt.
“You wouldn’t have to do any of this if it weren’t for me.”
“Perhaps.” She shrugged. “Or maybe it would have been something else. We can’t predict the future. All we can do is live for the moments we have.” She reached for her mother’s hand and smiled. “That’s right, isn’t it,Mamma?”
Cecilia, who had been silently gazing into space, blinked and turned to her daughter. “Moments are all we have,tesoro.Nothing is promised.”
Raya placed the flower behind her mum’s ear with a bright smile and then rested her head against Cecilia’s shoulder. Cecilia kissed the top of her head, and my eyes welled up as I thought of my mum and all the moments we’d never share again.
Nothing was promised.
When Olivia took over supervising Cecilia, Raya and I headed back towards the main house but stopped on the back steps to admire the sunset. An orange, pinkish glow illuminated the sky as the birds travelled overhead to take shelter for the night.
Raya sat down on a step, closed her eyes, and took a deep breath of the floral aroma with a contented sigh. “My favourite time of day.”
I smiled and perched next to her. “Why sunset?”
“I don’t know.” She opened her eyes and stared at the horizon. “It’s quiet.”
“I’ve always thought sunsets are a bit sad.” I placed my hands on the patio behind me and leaned back to watch the sun sink lower behind the treeline. “Like it always leaves you wanting to pause time.”
She pouted, thinking hard. “I’m not very good at putting how I feel into words. Words…” she swallowed as if there was something physically lodged in her throat. “...they don’t come easily to me. But I know what you mean. It’s longing. The need to hold on to things before they slip away. But look…” She pointed towards where the orange sky bled into crimson. “Endings can be beautiful too. Just look at how it’s worked out between you and Sani. You’re madly in love. I honestly thought you might castrate him after your wedding.”
I laughed, the sound blending with the last warmth of the Italian sunlight. “I did threaten to stab him with my shoe on the way to the church.”
“You should’ve,” Raya chuckled. “He’d have been in to it.”
I smiled as I reflected on that day and how furious I’d been at my completely deranged husband. “Ugh,” I moaned, rolling my eyes. “I hate that he’s always right. He told me in that car ride that one day I’d realise what he did was for both of us.”
“Yeah,” she breathed. “He’d been waiting to find you for a long time. He wasn’t going to let you get away from him, no matter what it took.”
“I keep thinking about what might have happened to me if I’d never walkedinto the massage room and mistaken him for the masseur. I’d have dated Callum and ended up in Ireland, held hostage by my psychotic uncle until he married me to some Russian heir for his own greed.” The hair on my arms bristled at the thought.
“Everything happens for a reason, and people come into your life when you need them most,” she said with a gentle smile. “I’m a firm believer in that.”
“So you think this is fate? That I’m here, married to your brother, and you’re willing to take my place as a Russian bride?”
She shrugged. “Maybe it is fate. I’ve felt for a while now that something is coming for me. Perhaps it’s this.”
I frowned, bristling at that ominous statement. “Something’s coming for you? Like a bad feeling?”
She twisted her lips and pushed a curl behind her ear as she pondered. “Not bad. Just… dark. Like I’m waiting for some great unravelling that will change the entire course of my life.”
I stared at the most complex woman I think I’ve ever met, yet somehow, I think I understood exactly what she meant. Sani was my undoing. He burst into my dull life in colour and opened my eyes to a world I’d never realised I belonged to. He made me feel everything so deeply from the moment I met him and compelled me to confront all the darker parts of myself I’d always avoided. In a way, I felt reborn, because this man loved me so fiercely yet softly, that for the first time in my life, I felt safe enough to truly be myself.
I smiled as I remembered something my mum used to say to me when I was a child. I hated going to bed, always wanting to stay up late with her and telling her how unfair it was that night came and I had to sleep.
“The sky doesn’t darken to punish you, but to prepare you for the stars,” I whispered her words, only now seeing beyond their meaning. My sky was the darkest it had ever been, but those stars had never seemed brighter, especially my North Star. The biggest grin spread across my face as an idea of showing Sani just how much I appreciated everything he’d done for me, for us, came to mind.
Raya looked at me with a smile. “I like that.”
