“Okay…” I reply, dragging out the word. “What did this Declan Callaghan want?”
“He wants you,” Ivan tells me as he lets out a heavy sigh. “According to Callaghan, your father owed him a large debt. When your father couldn't repay the debt he was given the option of handing you over to Callaghan as payment.”
“Excuse me?” I’m shocked by the admission and can’t help but think Ivan is making this up to keep me here against my will. “That’s not possible.”
“It’s true,” Ivan reinforces.
“What the fuck? My father would never consider that to be a viable option.
“I don’t know,lyubimaya. What I do know is that your father didn’t come up with the rest of the money he owed the Irish, so Callaghan had him killed and now they’re after you,” Ivan says.
My memory flashes back to the time after my father died but before I moved to Boston. I used to feel like someone was watching me while I was at school.
“The men who kidnapped you from the park worked for Callaghan,” Ivan explained. “He told me that he knows we have you here, and demanded we hand you over.”
Fear shot through me. “And you turned him down?” I ask.
“Of course I did,” Ivan growls. “I told him he could go fuck himself. Your father’s debt with him is not yours to pay.”
“Thank you.” I sigh with relief. I rub my temples with my fingers to try and relieve the tension headache that is creeping in. “So what does this all mean?”
“Security has been increased around the house. You will start learning basic self-defense moves and how to handle a gun,” Ivan tells me. “You are not to go anywhere on your own.”
“What about Gran’s ashes? I have to go to the funeral home and pick them up.”
“I’ll send someone to pick them up,” Ivan says, pulling his phone out. He send off a quick text message and puts it back in his pocket, focusing his attention back on me.
“This is a lot to process,” I tell him, feeling my heart start pounding in my chest.
“I won’t lie to you when it comes to your safety,” Ivan says, placing his hand on my knee. The move feels warm and comforting.
Ivan leans into the opposite corner of the couch and holds out his arm in invitation. Butterflies flutter in my stomach, and heat pools near my core much like it did last night when Ivan kissed me in the kitchen, but I’m not sure I’m ready to get that close to him after the news he gave me just now.
I look down at my lap where I’m fidgeting with my fingers. I’ve kissed men that I’ve dated, and none of them ever made me feel like Ivan’s kiss does. This man knows what he’s doing, and kissing him could lead somewhere I’m not sure I’m ready for.
“What’s wrong?” he asks, sitting up straighter and reaching for my hand.
“I need to share something with you, in the spirit of honesty,” I tell him. I’ve got to get this out before I lose my nerve, thought I don’t know why I feel he needs to know at this exact moment.
“Go on,” he says, raising his left eyebrow in suspicion.
“Your kiss makes me feel things that I haven’t felt for anyone before. I get butterflies if I even think about kissing you.” I feel a blush start to rise up my cheeks. Ivan just watches me, like he’s taking in all my words and waiting for me to continue.
“That makes me nervous, because I’ve never gone any further than kissing before, and I feel like a man in your position may have certain…expectations.”
“Are you saying you’ve never been with a man?” Ivan asks, learning forward and resting his forearms on his knees.
“Yes…” I whisper. Ivan sits back, watching me, and I have absolutely no idea what is going through his head. “I had boyfriends in college, but never had the interest to take anything beyond kissing. They broke up with me because I told them I wouldn’t sleep with them.”
“Those boys were stupid,” Ivan spits out. “A man would never do such a thing.”
“I think I’m starting to have feelings for you that make me want to take that next step, but I don’t know if I’m ready for that yet.”
“Come here,” Ivan says, motioning for me to come closer. I do, and he puts his arms around me. “I would not force myself on you in any situation.”
“Thank you, Ivan,” I say as I nuzzle into his chest.
“I loved kissing your lips that night. I won’t do anything until you are ready for it,” he says.
