Big fat rain drops start to fall, and there is a bolt of lightning that races through the sky. I pull Ruby with me. She seems nervous as I pull her toward my rental car, and my stomach drops.Please, tell me I didn’t just fuck this up.I had planned to just be here in case she needed me, but when I saw the preppy guy in the loafers walking toward her, I knew I had to do something. There’s no way I could just stand by while she danced with another man.
I help her inside and try to calm myself as I get around the car and into the driver's side. She is quiet the whole way, and I try and concentrate with the windshield wipers on high. It's ashort drive, but she doesn't say a thing. I can feel her eyes on me, but I don't say a word. I'm on edge, and it wouldn't take much for her to push me over, for us to do something that we would never be able to take back.
When we get to the hotel, I walk her to her room. After three tries of using her key card, she finally gets the door open and stumbles in, holding it open. "Are you going to come in?"
I dig my hands into the front pockets of my jeans. If I thought pushing her away when she was 18 was hard, this is even harder. "No."
Her eyes round, and her mouth falls open before she starts to stutter. "No? No! What do you mean no? Is this a game to you, Austin? You kiss me and then turn me away?"
She looks so hurt, and that was never my plan. I never want to hurt her, but I got myself into this, and I don't know how to stop it. "Let me explain, Ruby. You've been drinking."
She puts her hand on the wall to steady herself. "I'm over 21, Austin. I don't see what the big deal is."
I’m still standing in the hallway. It's late, and I definitely don't want to wake up everyone on the floor.
I lean in and tell her thickly, "The big deal is, Ruby, that when we make love, I want you to be sober for it. I want you to remember every fucking thing about it. I don't want there to be any doubt in your mind that this, me, I am what you want. That's the big deal."
She looks up at me, stunned. I've never been a person that cusses a lot, so maybe it's my use of the F word, or maybe it's the words themselves. But she backs into the room. "You know what, Austin McCoy? You're a tease. That's what you are."
She slams the door in my face. I stare at it, fighting temptation to push my way in and take her anyway. I know I'm doing the right thing, even though it's hard. I fucked up, but I can't have one night with her. Not when I want forever.
Chapter 6
Ruby
Isleep in again. I swear it's like I'm using this week to catch up on all of my sleep. When I wake up, I'm hungover, mad, and frustrated. I go straight to my laptop, and I have four more emails of “thanks, but no thanks.” Before I do something stupid like call up my ex-boss and give him a piece of my mind, I make plans for the day.
Some of the girls are going on a spa day, but I decide not to join them. I need to start saving money, it seems, seeing as how I no longer have any income coming in. I have savings that will last me for a while, but the thought of dipping into that makes me nervous. I shower, put on my bathing suit, pack my bag with sunscreen, a granola bar, and a smutty romance novel, and head out to the beach.
After finding a spot away from people, I coat my pale white skin in sunscreen and read for a little while before dropping the book to the sand next to me and laying my head back on the chair. I don't know how long I'm there before a shadow falls over me. I don't even have to open my eyes to know it's Austin. It's like my body reacts anytime he's within a 100-foot radius. I open one eye and look up at him. He's bare-chested, and his hat is nowhere to be seen. I pull my sunglasses from the top of myhead down to my face so he can't see the desire that I'm trying to hide. In a frustrated voice, I ask him, "What are you doing here? You're blocking the sun."
He sits down on the chair next to me. "Are you still mad at me for last night?"
I grit my teeth, hating that he's throwing that up at me. "Yeah, I'm still mad. I'm also done throwing myself at you only to be rejected over and over again.”
“Do it now."
I roll my head to the side and look at him. "Do what now?"
He leans forward. “Throw yourself at me."
He says it like a dare or a challenge, and I let my head roll away from him.
"No thank you," I answer.
I feel so exposed with him hovering next to me. I can feel his gaze go up and down my body, and my nipples pucker at his perusal. His voice is gruff. "You may be mad at me, but your body says otherwise."
I almost bring my hands up to cover my breasts, but I decide not to. Screw him. I don’t need to hide my reaction to him. I pretty much begged him to have sex with me last night, and he turned me down. I do give him a little huff and then continue ignoring him.
When his hand lands on my bare waist, my whole body jerks at the contact. I look at him out of the corner of my eye, and he scoots his chair closer to mine. His hand is right under the swell of my breast, and I'm secretly hoping that he moves it up and covers me. His fingers stroke back and forth across my bare skin.
He leans down closer, his voice at my ear. "I stopped last night because you had been drinking. I didn't want you to regret this. I needed to know that it's you and not the alcohol talking."
I want to call him out and ask him how he could not know that I want him. I've thrown myself at him over and over. Hehas to know how I feel about him. His hands continue to stroke along my midriff. "When is your next wedding activity?"
My mind draws a blank, and I shake my head. He does this to me. He makes me crazy. "I skipped the spa day. The next event is Saturday night at the rehearsal dinner."
"Good," he answers immediately. "Spend the next few days with me."
