“Yeah, I’m alright.”
There’s a slight pause, a gap where I can interject and mull this over before it gets worse. She waits in that silence, eyes locked on mine, but I don’t fill it.
“Look, if you’d prefer I get a ride home with Penny, I should go and catch up with them.”
It takes everything within me not to roll my eyes.
This shit is starting to piss me off. Justtellme what’s wrong. Stop making me guess. Stop acting hot and cold, and somewhere in between, in these rare moments where I’m no longer sure what’s fake and what’s real anymore.
“Would you prefer to go with Sweets?”
It’s a loaded question.
Her eyes search mine, mouth falling open a bit. “I—no? You’re just acting like you’d rather set yourself on fire than be in this hallway with me right now, so I figured that I should.”
I am already on fire. That’s the problem. I’ve been on fire since the morning you left my bed empty and let me feel like a moron for days afterward. My head is on fire. My mind already burnt to a fucking crisp.What are you doing to me, Red?
I don’t knowwhat I’m doing, or what she wants, or how to put a lid on my anger, but I know I’m not letting this fester any longer. Not when I’m letting the boys down because of it.
I swallow, my jaw ticking. I know whatIwant. “I’d like to drive you home.”
After a moment, she nods. “Okay.”
I gesture toward the doors and we fall into step with each other. She’s quiet now, and her eyes are burning clear billows of steam ahead of her. When I move to push open the door to the arena, I shoulder my bag before I reach down and take her hand in mine. The usual quick squeeze of herfingers never comes. Her hand lies limply in mine, but she lifts her chin and we stroll through the empty parking lot together.
The cameras start clicking, but not nearly as crazily as they were a month ago. Still, I don’t feel particularly safe unless I’m holding her hand, even if there is absolutely no media pushing their way into our faces. She’s gotta stay within reach.
I guide her to the car, open her door, and help her inside. She stares straight ahead the whole time, hands in her lap, and doesn’t even spare me a glance when I shut the door and storm around the front of the vehicle.
I’ve started to stop for fans more frequently now. She likes it. It brightens her day, so I do it. For the fans, yes, but mostly for her. Not tonight. No. I know my limits, and withwhateveris swirling around in my head right now, I’ll bite someone’s head off if I stop.
When I don’t slow and only wave at security instead, she turns her face completely away from me to look out of the window. She angles her legs away from me, too. The telltale sign that a woman wants you to drop fucking dead.
I run my hand over my mouth, letting out a long breath through my nose. This is torture. I don’t like silence on a good day, but this is hell on earth. We’re both mad, I think. I’m pissed as hell, but she seems like she’s just as angry.
We don’t say a word until I’m pulling into the parking lot of her building and she’s unbuckling her belt like she can’t get out of here fast enough.
Nope. That’s not the way thisworks anymore.
“Red,” I say, my tone holding a warning.
She freezes, eyes darting up to mine.
“We need to talk.”
She swallows, slowly lowering her hands and relaxing back into the seat. “Okay.”
“I’m sorry if I ruined what we had going on,” I say, trying to keep my voice even and calm, even though that anger and worry are simmering below the surface. “If you want to call it, just let me know, but I can’t function like this.”
Her brow furrows. “Like what?”
I gesture between us. “This.”
Her eyes drop to my hand as her frown deepens. “What are you talking about?”
“For fuck’s sake, Arden,” I snap, and she flinches. “I’m not stupid. I don’t want to play these games with you. That wasn’t a rule.”
She just looks at me, face full of confusion.
