My tone is more intense than I intended it to be. He is like a brother to me, although, I know he isn’t doing this for me; he is doing this to honor my mother. Sometimes, I am jealous that he knew her better than her own son did. Sadly, my father stole her from me before I had the chance to build the memories that I so wished I could have and because of that, Alex and I share a mutual disdain for my father.
“Remember, Carmine, you aren’t untouchable. Eventually, this is going to come to the surface. Especially if you have a loose kink in your midst. You can send them up to Christian all you want, he can work magic on the flesh, but unless he can alter flawed souls, you still need to be careful.”
Anger begins to settle in as I grow increasingly resentful with the position my father has put me in. Although this life comes with power, it also comes with an immense amount of pressure. This war that my idiotic father started with the Ricci family after they completed their merger with my father’s other enemy, the Marinos, has completely changed the trajectory of so many lives.
I digress from my own thoughts and bring the conversation back to Alex. “Christian works their flesh, but I will put the fear of Carmine in them.”
“You mean the fear of God?”
“No, because when I hold the cold steel of my Glock to the temple of whoever dares test me, it will be a gentle reminder of who they work for. God won’t be there to save them from my wrath,” I declare. “No one will.”
I am not interested in redeeming the unredeemable. Very little in this world is redeemable; I should know, considering how far I have fallen. And in the off chance my soul can, indeed, be saved, it won’t be God who can redeem it. It will be her. Only she can grant absolution to a man as wicked as I.
Chapter11
Sienna
“Hurry up, girl, we have twenty minutes until the Uber gets here,” Nessa announces as we walk through the doorway into her apartment with the last of my boxes. As soon as we enter, it is immediately evident how much Nes works and is not home. The whole place looks un-lived in, almost. Most of the walls are bare, without any décor or character. There is not a mess in sight, other than a takeout bag I spot on the otherwise untouched kitchen countertops.
“We literally just walked in the door, Nes, you don’t want to chill for a little bit before going out?” I ask, pouting my lower lip playfully.
I figured I would ask, but I already know the answer. Nes runs on her time only. It’s what she wants when she wants, and everyone usually just follows suit, me included. Some would call her bossy, but I admire how determined of a person she is. This world needs more women like her who are unapologetically themselves.
She heads to the fridge, ignoring my playful plea for more time. “Nope, those puppy dog eyes, and pouty lip don’t do shit for me,” she says as she grabs a beer from the fridge for her and me. Handing me a Corona, she glances at the clock on the wall of the kitchen. “Come on, Sienna, that is plenty of time. You already have your clothes hung up in the spare bedroom closet. Just go pick something from there and you’ll be good to go.” She nudges me in the direction of the spare room.
I take a swig of my beer, swishing the fizz around my mouth before letting it coat my throat. Sighing, I begrudgingly head to get changed. I know Nessa having a night off is rare. She purposely swapped shifts to work earlier so she could pick me up and bring me down to the city. So, the least I can do is suck it up and go out for a drink or two.
I flip the light switch to what is now technically my bedroom and head to the closet. It’s a small room, nothing lavish, but it’s enough for me. I’m not high maintenance; there isn’t much I need other than a place to sleep, hang my clothes, and store my books. If I can do that in a space, I am all set. I look to the large window with a view of the crowded streets and notice a picturesque park across the street. The view is oddly serene, despite being set smack dab in the center of the city.
There are two closets in the room, one smaller than the other, so I moved my clothes into the larger of the two. I head to the large closet that has a mirror attached to the front, which reminds me of the one Nes and I shared in our dorm years ago. Knowing Nes and how frugal she is, it is more than likely the same mirror from our college days.
I halfway open the door and begin to sift through the clothes. I don’t even remember what I have in here, because I brought this batch of clothes to Nessa well over a month ago. As I glide the hangers on the metal bar of the closet, I see mostly going out or what would be considered work attire. Nothing like my usual black leggings and concert tees that I prefer wearing.
I look through a few moments more. Not finding anything that I am crazy about, I step back from the clothes and shut the door. I look at myself in the door mirror, debating just leaving on my leggings and Aerosmith tee shirt I have on now and calling it a day.
As if Nes is reading my mind, she knocks on the open door before letting herself into the room.
“No, you’re not wearing that out. Don’t even think about it.” She walks past me and swings the closet door fully open. She hums to herself as she sorts through the clothes until she finds something for me. “Ah, here. This is perfect!” she exclaims, dangling a black off-the-shoulder dress in the air. “This work?” she asks, already handing me the dress.
“Sure. That will work,” I say, laughing, as if she is giving me any choice in the matter.
“Excellent,” she says, taking the final gulp of her beer. “Now, hurry the fuck up and get dressed. Then, meet me in the kitchen for shots.”
She starts heading back out toward the kitchen. In the doorway, with her hand on the doorknob, about to shut it, she turns back to face me. “I’m glad you are here, Sienna. I have a feeling that you will finally be able to start over here.” She smiles and closes the door behind her.
Fuck I hope so.
I quickly slip on the dress, throwing my previous outfit on the bed. I debate sprucing up my hair, but after seeing my reflection in the mirror of the closet door in front of me, it doesn’t look half bad. Nes did pick an awesome dress for me. I love how this hugs my curves without being too tight. Plus, it has pockets.Winning. It also highlights my tattoos nicely, especially my stitch marks I recently added to my collarbone area.
Scanning the small vanity next to the closet for my lipstick, I realize it is in my purse, which I left in the kitchen. Perfect timing, as I hear glasses clanking from the kitchen cabinet.
As my foot hits the kitchen floor, Nessa has already poured shots for us and is handing me one.
“Cheers to best friends taking on the city together. Fucking finally!” she cheers as we clank our shot glasses together before downing what smells like cinnamon whiskey. I make a sour face. Whiskey has never been a go-to for me.
“And hopefully, to getting some dick tonight!” she adds, giggling as she grabs another Corona for each of us.
“Nessa!” I blush.
