“Yeah, so?” He squeezed my waist. “What’s the problem?”
“You want to stay in Colorado. I want to stay in Scotland.”
There. It was out there.
Hudson studied my face for a moment and I couldn’t miss the concern that flickered in his eyes. Finally he asked, “Would you consider staying here… at all?”
“I can’t leave my brother, Hudson. He’s the only family I’ve ever had and I don’t want to miss out on all the important moments in his life or vice versa. If something were to happen to him and I’d missed out on all of that… I’d have to live with so much regret. And it’s not just that. I mean, Killian hasn’t even met you. What if you don’t get along or he’s upset that this is happening so fast?”
For some reason that caused Hudson’s expression to darken and he stepped back from me entirely. Moments ago I’d felt overwhelmed by him and now that he was giving me space, I didn’t like it. And I really didn’t like it when he practically growled, “If you plan to make decisions about our future based on what your brother thinks about us, we’ve got even bigger problems than a location issue, babe.”
Okay, so I was definitely ‘angel’ when he liked me and ‘babe’ when I’d pissed him off. Noted.
Also, Ihatedpissing him off.
But I was also a little pissed off he was being insensitive. “You’re coming at this from your perspective, Hudson. Big, boisterous loving family—parents, brother, cousins, aunts, and uncles. I only have Killian.”
“Yeah, I get that. But I’m close to my brother, too. However, what you don’t see is me waiting to see if Jakeapprovesof you before I decide to make you a part of my future. You are my future. Period. The fact that I’m not that to you until I have your brother’s approval fucking pisses me off.”
Now I was really angry. My face flushed and his eyes narrowed at whatever he saw in my gaze. “Don’t you understand why I’m so upset? Ihavedecided you’re my future. All those important moments I was talking about? I can’t picture them now with anyone else but you and the reason I’m upset is because I want to share those moments, our moments, with my family who happens to be my brother and I’m scared shitless because whatever happens here”—I gestured frantically between us—“I’m going to lose someone that I love!”
The word rang out around us for just a fraction of a second and then Hudson was kissing me.
He was kissing me like the only way to get oxygen was to kiss it out of me.
I wrapped myself around him, completely forgetting where we were.
When he finally pulled back, he said, sounding breathless, “You love me?”
I shrugged, helplessly. “Heart on sleeve girl here.”
“You love me?”
“I love you.”
He crushed me against him, holding me so tight. “I love you, too. Fuck, I love you, too.”
I shook my head against his chest, feeling a spectacularly confusing rush of bliss and fear. “What are we doing, Hudson?”
After a moment of just holding me, Hudson tipped my head back with his thumb against my chin, and butterflies rushed to life in my belly at the way he looked at me. All barriers were down.
He loved me.
It blazed out of his eyes.
Hudsonlovedme.
“I don’t want to lose you,” I whispered fearfully.
Shaking his head, he hushed me. “Let’s just sit on it for a few days, okay? We’ll each take time to think, to really think, all the while enjoying the fuck out of loving each other. And when your vacation is coming to an end, we’ll sit down and we’ll hash this out. But whatever happens, Autumn, you won’t lose someone you love. So I’m asking you to just hold on a few more days. Can you do that? Can you hold on?”
I nodded, knowing there wasn’t much I wouldn’t do for this man. “I can hold on.”
8
As promised, I only considered our dilemma when we weren’t enjoying the heck out of each other. And we did. Oh, we did that thoroughly.
I’d never considered myself particularly sexually adventurous before Hudson, but when I was with him all my inhibitions disappeared. No man had ever made me feel more wanted and that gave me a kind of sexual confidence and power that made me revel in our lovemaking.
