“Until?”
“Until you’re pregnant.”
“Pregnant?” I whisper, wondering how the hell I’m going to chase if I’m pregnant. I shake my head, not wanting to give up my career because of this bond. “Oakley, I wouldn’t stop chasingif I were pregnant, and I know what I do is an issue for you. How would we get past that? How do I know I’m ready to be a mother? Why does it happen so fast?”
He tries to come to me, blurring a short distance. Oklahoma runs out of energy and crumbles to the floor. He shouts, punching the nightstand so hard that it snaps in half. The lamp tumbles to the ground, shattering into tiny pieces. The mug that was full of bitter melon tea tips over, the red-tinted liquid splashing onto the floor.
Blood drips from Oklahoma’s ears, nose, and eyes all at once.
“Oakley!” I’m by his side in the next step, wiping away the blood the best I can. “Why did you use all of that energy? Look what you did to yourself.” I hold back tears. The fear of losing him before I really get to have him hits me.
If he dies, I die.
I’ve never been afraid of death.
Now, I’m only afraid I won’t get to live life with whom the universe chose just for me.
“What were you thinking?!” I yell in Japanese. “You need to rest. I can’t live without you. Don’t kill yourself before I have a chance to love you!” I grip his shirt and give him a small shake, begging him to have a healthy life with me.
Our foreheads press together, his chest heaving with exertion. His fangs are showing, his tongue licking the left cuspid, his gaze lingering on my throat.
Now isn’t the time. I don’t want our mating to happen like this.
“Sugar, I don’t know what you’re saying. What is it? What’s wrong? I’d love to learn your language. It’s so beautiful. I could listen to you speak all day.”
My own tear breaks free, warming my cheek as it slides down to my jawline. Oklahoma is there, his lips kissing the droplet away.
“Even your tears taste good.” His words are a whispered breath, a phantom across my cheek.
“I said you need to rest. I can’t live without you. Don’t kill yourself.” I trace his lips, loving how they are shaped. “Don’t kill yourself before I have a chance to love you.”
“Oh, Sugar. I ain’t going anywhere. I was trying to get to you to reassure you. I’m not a fan of storm chasing, but I’d never stop you from doing what you loved. I’d trust you to make the right decisions for your safety. I’d never ask you not to do something, but that won’t mean I’m not scared to watch you do it. I’ll be terrified. One thing that will help is being able to feel your emotions. Similar to what I can now.”
“You can feel me?” I sniffle.
He nods slowly; the motion causing a drop of blood to spill from his nose. “I can. Your worry, your fear, your happiness and confusion, but when you’re mine and claimed,” he growls, “I’ll be able to feel you even when you aren’t close to me. I’ll be able to find you if anything goes wrong. You’ll feel me too, like a warmth in your soul to keep you safe.”
“I like the sound of that,” I admit, then turn away.
“What? Talk to me. You’re feeling something really heavy, Sugar. On a regular day, I can take it, but today, it’s making it a little difficult to breathe.”
I cover my mouth and scurry backwards to give him space. “I’m so sorry.”
“It’s alright. It’s okay. You didn’t know.” His eyes hood with exhaustion, darkened clouds forming under his eyes.
“I’m worried you’ll resent me if I continue to chase.”
“I’d resent…” he gasps. “If…you didn’t.” The wheezes are deeper and longer.
I have too much to think about. This mating bond happens so fast. I barely have time to make sense of it. Well, not really, but pregnant? So soon? That wasn’t in my plan.
I’m open to it. I want children one day. Some day. I always thought they would happen ten years from now.
“Let’s get you back to bed. I’ll get you another mug of tea.” I help him to bed, taking it slow and steady, and he doesn’t protest.
He is pale again, his face losing all color. Death seems close with how grey he is, the natural shadows of his face more prominent.
“I’ll be right back with your tea,” I say to his still form.
