I dressed quickly, and grabbed the car keys, making a beeline for the door when I heard, “JR?”
I stopped, biting my tongue to hold back the involuntary curse at being slowed down. I turned back to see Jenna standing just outside the kitchen. She was drying off her hands on a dishtowel.
“Yeah?”
“Look, I wanted to talk to you about the other night…”
I put my hands up. “I’m sorry about that. I should have picked a better time to tell everyone. I shouldn’t have done it in front of Lindsey. That was inappropriate.”
Jenna scrunched her eyebrows together and shook her head. “No, not at all. You have nothing to apologize for. I want Lindsey to grow up with love in her heart.Understanding and tolerance. Who needs to apologize is your mother. What she said to you…” Jenna paused, and looked away. “What she said to you was disgraceful, and, whether she apologizes or not,Iwant to apologize. No one should be spoken to like that when they come out.”
I was stunned. I never expected her to… I don’t know, care? She always walked around like she completely hated my guts, so her unexpected compassion was making me uncomfortable.
“Thank you,” was all I managed to say.
We stared at each other for a few seconds. I thought she was going to say more, but she just nodded and disappeared back into the kitchen.
I thought about Jenna’s words all the way to the store, and the more I thought about them, the more confused I was. Did she still hate me? Or were things different now that she knew I was gay? Was it just pitying me for my mother spitting what she had?
I shook my head and parked the car. “Jenna is the last thing you need to be thinking about right now,” I muttered under my breath as I walked past the 90-year-old man standing at the entranceway. One day it would be nice to go to a store that wasn’t fucking Walmart, but, for the time being, it would suit my purpose.
In the men’s clothing section I found a plain, black, zip-up hoodie. I made my way to the personal care aisles. I grabbed a new deodorant in a different scentalong with a matching body spray. One aisle over, I stopped in front of a locked glass display case filled with condoms, lubricants, and generic sex toys.
With a heavy sigh, I pushed the red call button beside the case. A red light flashed, so I assumed that someone had received my summons.
After waiting for what seemed like an eternity, a pimple-faced associate who couldn’t have been any older than 17 came around the corner and pressed the call button again, making the light go out.
“Can I help you?” he said.
“Uh, yeah. I need something out of there”
“What do you need?” he asked, pulling a key ring out of his pocket and opening the glass door.
Fuck, the lube being locked down like a military installation had thrown me off, and I hadn’t even looked at the options. “Um, I’m actually not sure. Can you give me a minute?”
The kid raised an eyebrow. “I can’t leave while the case is unlocked,” he replied flatly.
“Yeah… makes sense.”
I would have googled ‘good anal lube brands’and been more prepared had I known there was going to be so much pressure.
Fuck.
I grabbed the first silicone-based lube I saw, along with a 12-pack of Trojans and nodded awkwardly at the guy as I started walking away.
“Hey, I have to take those to the register for you.”
I stopped and turned back. “But I’m not finished shopping.”
“You can come back and get them when you are all done, then,” he said, reaching his hand out to take the items back from me.
“I would prefer to not go through this again. I just need one more thing.”
He shrugged. “Okay, go ahead.”
I sighed in relief and gave him a friendly smile. “Thanks.”
“But I’m going with you.”
