I put a hand over my face. “Ugh, Beth told you, didn’t she?”
“Well, she knew you certainly wouldn’t tell us.” My mother laughs.
“Theo was just a friend. I don’t feel that way about him,” I lie. “Besides, my plan doesn’t allow for dating until three years in anyway, so this whole summer was a waste.”
My mother sighs. “Oh, sweetie, that’s not true.” She moves to brush a curl behind my ear and places a soft hand on the side of my face. “You don’t always get to decide when you fall in love, Sienna, or who you fall in love with. It’s not something that can be planned, only something that can be felt when the time comes.”
Her words stick with me through our dinner. I couldn’t possibly love Theo. I’ve only known him for a few months.
My brain continues to battle my heart as I toss and turn all night in my childhood bedroom. The restless night has become my new normal since leaving the lake house weeks ago.
34
THEO
Asense of relief washes over me each time my fist collides with the punching bag hanging in front of me. I punch in a basic one-two rhythm. It’s unlike any of the combos I’ve seen Alex perform, but it gets the job done.
“Your form is shit,” Alex says behind me, but I don’t so much as glance at him as my attention stays focused on the bag in front of me.
One, two. One, two. One, two.
“You’re going to hurt yourself if you keep hitting that way.” Alex is in front of me now, holding the bag in place as I continue to punch. My hits grow more aggressive and erratic as visions of my own stupidity flash through my mind.
You almost fucking killed her.
Hitting as hard as I can, I curse, as Alex was right. My shitty form causes a pain to shoot up through my shoulder on my last punch. A disgruntled noise leaves my throat at the feeling.
Stomping away from the punching bag, I take a seat on a nearby bench, ripping my gloves off.
“Told you,” Alex says smugly.
“Shut up.”
“Feel better?”
“Not even a little.” I run my hands through my hair, wiping the sweat from my brow. Alex moves to sit next to me, handing me my water bottle as I take a moment to catch my breath.
I think I speak for all of my brothers when I say we’re thankful that Alex chose this line of work. When he opened his boxing gym a few years ago, he gave all of us a key and told us we could come here whenever we needed to, no questions asked. I would guess that Roman uses his key most often, but I have no evidence to back it up.
I’ve never felt I had a reason to use my key until a few weeks ago. I’ve spent every day here for the past two weeks trying to get Sienna out of my head. To my agony, I’ve been unsuccessful.
Alex lives in the apartment above his gym, so he knows how frequently I’ve visited over the past few weeks, but this is the first time he’s joined me. I’m thankful he opens later on Sundays so I could sneak in this morning and have the place to myself. Before Alex came downstairs, that is.
Looking around the empty gym, I take note of the high-end equipment. The ambient lighting is set to the lowest setting, as I didn’t think anything else would be fitting for my current mood. Alex’s gym is another reminder of how I’ve only failed where my brothers have succeeded.
“You want to talk about it?” Alex finally asks after a few moments of silence.
“Not particularly, no.” I hesitate before continuing, “I fucked up. There’s no fixing it, so I’m trying to figure out how to live with it.”
“The ‘it’ being…” He waits for me to finish his sentence.
“Losing Sienna, disappointing Roman, once again failing to help him see that I’d make Dad’s company more successful, although at this point, I’m even starting to doubt that.”
“Hmm…” When that’s all Alex responds with, I look at him to find him staring at me with a concerned look I rarely ever see from him.
“What?”
“Why do you insist on calling it ‘Dad’s company’?” he finally asks.
