But I can’t think of “what-ifs” when the truth is I’m stuck with a bunch of strangers pretending to be my family.
“That’s not the point, Travan,” I snap. “The point is none of you told me the truth. You weren’t there when I needed you.”
The silence that follows is thick and almost suffocating. I feel it like a physical weight resting on my shoulders.
“Izzy,” Silas begins, his one good eye softening as it meets mine.
I wonder what happened to the other one. I’ve never bothered to ask before, but now… Now it matters. Everything about these men matters. They’re my fathers.
“You have to understand. It wasn’t easy for any of us, either. We didn’t know how to tell you.”
“Well, maybe you should’ve figured it out,” I bite back. “You could’ve tried, instead of pretending I wasn’t important enough to know the truth. To know who you are to me.”
All three men flinch like I’ve slapped them, and good. I want them to hurt, the way they hurt me.
The tension in the air grows, building to unspeakable levels. Nothing short of a katana sword would be capable of slicing through it. The only thing keeping me from losing my shit is Reid’s hand in mine, an anchor in this turbulent storm.
“I just…” I swallow hard, struggling to find the words. “I don’t know how to handle this. How to handleyou. I have so many questions, but I don’t know which ones to even start asking.”
How did you meet my mother?
Is it true that you dated my aunt?
Why didn’t you try to find me?
Did you even suspect I was still alive?
How were you able to hide a bunch of dead bodies with just a single phone call?
Why didn’t you tell me the truth sooner?
“We don’t expect you to figure this out right now,” Silas tells me with a gentleness belying his gruff appearance. “Just…take your time. We’re not going anywhere.”
“No where,” Kyle agrees with a resolute nod.
Travan, I notice, is suspiciously quiet…but it could be because he’s distracted by his brownie. It appears as if he’s trying to make a sculpture out of the gooey snack.
“You don’t understand. I don’t know if Iwantyou to be here,” I whisper, feeling dizzy from the weight of their words. Their conviction.
They’re all here, but none of it feels right. None of it feels the way I expected it to, when I first learned I had family still alive.
They’re strangers masquerading as my family, and I don’t know how to deal with that. With them. A blistering wrath I’ve never experienced before scalds my insides.
“We’ll answer any questions you have,” Kyle tells me gently. “What if we meet up again tomorrow? This will give you some time to think things over, decide what you want to ask.”
“And if you decide you don’t want to meet with us—” Silas begins.
“—we’ll just stalk you instead,” Travan finishes with a bright smile.
Silas lets out a sigh of exasperation and gives his pack mate a loaded look. “We’ll give you your space,” he corrects. “We’re going at your speed, Izzy. Always. Just… Just give us a chance. That’s all we’re asking. Let us prove to you that we’re sorry and that we want you in our lives. Can you do that? Can you give us one chance?”
Thirty-Four
IZZY
“So…that was awkward,” Emery says as soon as we step out of the cafe, leaving Jake, Kyle, Silas, and Travan behind.
Jake claimed he needed to discuss “work-related matters” with Silas, but I have a feeling my foster brother is taking the time to reprimand the three adults.
