The receiving party shall keep the vagina, anal area, and surrounds in a hair-free state. Schedule all necessary appointments around your other commitments.
The receiving party is expected to be available for intercourse at the suggestion of the employer. Sometimes this instruction will be a verbal command; at other times, the receiving party shall interpret and understand visual cues from the employer and perform accordingly.
Again, what the actual fuck? My mind wanders to some uptight CEO miming a blowjob with a clenched fist being brought to his mouth across a conference table. Plus, the fine print.
A birth control implant or contraceptive injections will be supplied to the receiving party. Any pregnancy voids the contract immediately.
The receiving party is expected to carry herself with elegance and poise in the employer's company and his business associates, and wider circle. All events will be responded to with gratitude, an outfit appropriate to the event selected and approved by the employer prior to the event.
No, or minimal, alcohol is consumed at any event. This will be at the discretion of the employer and strictly adhered to. Any embarrassing or unruly behavior will cause the instant termination of the contract.
Payment to the receiving party will be at month-end after a two month trial period by the employer from a subsidiary account.
The daily salary is $2500 per day for 360 days. Five special notarized days attract a $20,000 rate, resulting in a yearly salary of one million dollars ($1,000,000).
Should the receiving party be terminated for any reason, a $150,000 fee will be deducted from any payment to cover re-advertising and administration fees.
Termination requires the receiving party to return any items loaned to the receivingparty for the duration of the Executive Personal Assistant role. This includes clothing and accessories such as jewelry or bags (see Appendix 6 for a full item listing)
One hour and eleven minutes later.
Me
You want me to be a CEO’s personal prostitute? Are you out of your mind?
Pen
It’s an Executive Personal Assistant role. Emphasis on personal.
Me
You’re not funny
Pen
I’m not trying to be. You need a job; I have a listing.
Me
I can’t do this.
Pen
You can do this. Did you see the salary?
Me
Yes, I saw the damn salary
Pen
Think of all the treatment and surgery Cait still has ahead of her
Me
I am! That’s the only reason we are still having this unhinged text exchange.
Pen
