“We should still marry. The sooner the better.”
I nod adamantly. “But after we get Lily. Remember our first mission,” I remind him. “The most important one.”
“I do.” I grab my purse off the floor and search for my phone.
"Ope! I got a text from her!” I squeal too loudly. "Sorry." I cringe.
"For what?" Killian momentarily takes his eyes off the road to glance my way, his brows furrowed.
"For shouting. I got excited."
"I enjoy when you're excited, Zolotse." Ahh, this man. I might be in love. Okay, I am.
“People find it annoying.”
“I am not people.”
“This is true.” I beam at him. “You’re my sweetheart.” My outbursts and quirks don't faze him.
"What does the text say?"
"Oh, right." I click it. “She said Destiny's Tower!” I bounce in my seat.
"Destiny's Tower?"
"Yep, it's the tower in the game Destiny that's the primary hub for the Guardians." Killian still appears to not know what I mean. "Headquarters for the Vanguard!"
"Is this a video game?"
"Yes, have you never played?"
“No, I haven’t played video games since I was a kid. A few times the neighborhood kids would invite us over.” Right, hischildhood was so different from mine. It makes my heart ache. I’m guessing he means him and his foster sibling.
“After we get married and have kids, they can have all the video game systems in the world. And we have to have more than one. That way they have each other too.” Killian doesn’t respond, his eyes trained on the road, so I keep rambling as I always do. “I already have most of them, so we can play them too, you know, when we get back home.”
The word "home" halts me in my rambling. Killian is a nomad who always wants to keep moving, never staying any place long. Could I live that way? I already miss Minnie and Ro. Lily is coming to live with me too.
Killian grunts his response, but this time it doesn't sound like an agreement at all.
Chapter Eighteen
KILLIAN
People and their reactions don’t surprise me. I’ve seen people do crazy and fucked-up shit that others would bet their lives they wouldn’t. My little ball of energy, however, is shocking the fuck out of me, or maybe it's the things I feel when she does and says them.
Teddy was more than ready to help me cover up a murder—wait, self-defense, she's been calling it. Then she'd suggested we get married, andthentalked of children. I can’t help but imagine this life she’s painted for us. One with a steady home, a family, love and happiness. Things that I never thought were in the cards for me. I'm good at taking things in quickly and adapting, but this hit me sideways.
It freaked me out, not because I don't want it, which is insane all on its own, but because I do. If I wanted all these things my Teddy Bear is wanting to give me, I have cleanup to do to start shifting my life in that direction. I can’t be running around killing people. It seems retirement is now right around the corner.
While my mind had been processing how to handle all these details and the Lily situation, my Zolotse has gone quiet, makingan uneasiness start to grow inside of me. The mood has shifted, and I fucking loathe it. I'm not sure how to change it back.
I knew something was really fucking wrong when we stopped at the cheese museum and hadn't stayed very long. We were in and out. I could tell myself it's because she's in a hurry to get to Lily, but it's more than that, and I know it.
Has the adrenaline of what happened now worn off and the reality of it set in? Will she fear me now? Is she plotting to get away from me? I grip the steering wheel tighter. That anxiety I've never experienced before Teddy is growing inside of me.
"You don't want to listen to music, Zolotse?" I ask.
"If you want." I glance over, and she gives me a soft smile, but I see the sadness in her eyes. I loathe it. I would do anything in my power to take it from her, but I don’t know what’s put it there and in turn how to fix it.
