I freeze.
He steps closer. “Why, Olivia?”
I look away, my mouth is dry. I can’t say anything. I can’t speak the truth. It will be trouble, trouble I can’t afford to get into.
He shouts now. “Say something! Say anything!” I’ve never heard him shout before, and it takes me by surprise.
My body jerks with the force of his anger. “I… I’m sorry.”
The words are barely a whisper. I shouldn’t have said anything. I should’ve kept quiet, but his voice scared me.
His face twists. “You’re sorry?” His voice rises, breaks, raw with fury. “You’re fucking sorry? I was ready to give you everything, Olivia! Everything!” I flinch as he takes another step closer to me. “I would’ve given you the damn world! I only ever wanted you, wanted to love you, and you broke me with a snap of a fucking finger.” He steps closer with every word, each one a blow, and I’m doing everything not to cry at his words, but I know it’s all true.
He would have given me the world. He would have made me smile every single day.
“I hate you. I fucking hate what you did to me. You killed everything I believed in. I loved you. I fucking loved you, and you…you stabbed me.”
My chest aches. My legs feel like they’ll give way. I can’t breathe; I can’t talk because there are no words I can say to him to make this right.
“I hate you,” he snarls, but his eyes glisten like he’s battling with himself. “But I’ve only ever thought about you.”
As quick as the words escape him, his lips are on mine. What the hell is happening?
The kiss is fire, pain, and fury all at once. I can barely breathe beneath it. I should push him away, but I can’t. It’s like drowning in everything we could have been. I pull on his t-shirt not wanting him to stop, wanting him to keep kissing me, praying he continues to kiss me, but then he pulls back. Eyes hollow. Mouth trembling.
“You’re back,” he mutters, shaking his head. “And I fucking wish you never did.”
He turns to walk away. “Hayden—” I whisper, reaching out, but he doesn’t stop, why would he?
I stand there, shaking, still feeling his lips on mine, never wanting to stop the feeling.
“You fucked up,” a voice says behind me. I turn to see Mason, arms crossed, eyes cold. “He hates you, but he never stopped loving you.” I say nothing. I can’t, I know his whole family hates me. “He’ll never forgive you until you tell him why you did it.”
“I can’t.” the words escape in a whisper.
Mason leans in close. “You broke him. We put the pieces back together, but some are still missing. So, if you break him again, I swear, Olivia, I’ll burn your whole world down.” And with that he walks away, his threat still in the air around me.
And I stand alone, tears fall as I pick up the envelope off the table, crumpled, rejected, like me.
How do I tell him I’m sorry, how do I tell him that since that night I’ve never been with another man, because I only love one man. I love Hayden Crawford, and no one else.
Sixteen
Hayden
I slamthe door behind me like it will shut it all out, the kiss, her voice, those damn eyes which have haunted me for years, the memories of her are always there.
There is nothing to help me forget what she did to me. Nothing helps, no matter how much I tell myself she’s betrayed me, no matter how much I see the scars I have because of her. There is always a reminder.
My hands clench into fists, I hate myself. I hate the taste of her still on my lips. Hate the fact that for all my screaming and rage, all it took was one look at her and I cracked.
I want to rip her out of me, limb by limb, memory by memory. But she’s in there too deep. No matter how loud I tell myself I hate her, it’s never louder than how much I used to love her.
Used to? I have to laugh at the words, because the fucked up thing is I still fucking love her. Even after what she did to me, I still fucking love her. And I hate myself for it.
I climb into the back of the car. Miles is behind the wheel. He knows I’m sitting in the back because I don’t want to talk to anyone. He doesn't say anything, and it’s a smart move. Thesilence between us is thick, almost suffocating. But right now, I need to feel suffocated, pain, anything that isn’t Olivia.
I don’t even look out the window, when I feel Olivia walking away. When Mason slides into the passenger seat, he looks over his shoulder. “Blake’s garage,” I snap at him, before he can say anything.
