“What?” Lucas frowned doubtfully. “Then why were you gone so long?” He squinted. “Are you lying so you can get the money?”
Derek swallowed a couple of times and cleared his throat. “I don’t want your money,” he mumbled and turned to leave.
Lucas grabbed his arm. “Why were you gone so long if he didn’t show?”
“I was out driving around.” He jerked loose of Lucas’ grip and left the room. Technically, he wasn’t lying about Patrick not showing up for the date. Hewasn’tthere at six, and when he did show up—he wasn’t expecting Derek to still be at the restaurant. The date thatdidhappen was an accident.
He climbed the stairs and went to his room.Solitudemay not be the best thing for him right now—too much on his mind—but neither did he want to hang out with the guys and have to endure their questions, theories on why Patrick didn’t show, or simply their looks of “sympathy.”
Tossing his jacket on the bed, Derek went to the window and stared out at the dark lawn. His gaze slowly turned upward to the starry sky—and he immediately thought about Patrick lying beneath the stars and contemplating the vastness of the universe.
Derek tried to look beyond the stars to whatever lay beyond. An eternal force?God?A spark of anger sliced his soul. “Is this really what you want for him—for all of us?” His words strained. “Is it?You make us this way and thencondemnus for it?” He swallowed. “Yeah, some of us don’t give a shit—but look what you’re doing toPatrick.Is that what youwant—for him to beashamedevery time hefeelssomething for another man? Don’t youfucking care?”His chin trembled and he turned away from the window. “Fuck.”
. . .
“Is Derek all right?” Marcus looked worried, his deep love for all the men of the house surfacing full force.
“I’m sure he will be.” Garrett hugged the boy, feeling some concern himself.
“I’ve never seen him like this,” Jack said. “When has he ever been serious enough about a guy to get upset if things didn’t work out? He usually just moves on to his nextvictim.” His ensuing smile lacked humor.
Chase circled the pool table, having lost interest in the game of eight-ball he and Zachary had started up just before Derek arrived home. “Didn’t he just meet this guy, like, yesterday? What’s he getting all worked up about?”
“Maybe it was love at first sight?” Bailey suggested. “It’s real. It happens. And it seems like the only plausible explanation in this case. Derek wouldn’t be so upset over some random guy he just wanted to fuck.” He shook his head. “There has to be more to it than that.”
“There is,” Lucas spoke low. “We talked about it this morning.”
Zachary smiled. “That’s what you call what you did this morning—talking?”
Lucas shrugged. “Best way to talk.”
Bailey exchanged an amused look with Garrett.
“I think Bailey is right,” Lucas said. “It isn’t about trying to get in Patrick’s pants. He really,reallyliked this guy. And from what he told me about Patrick—I think he likes Derek, too. He’s just fucked in the head with all that religious bullshit.” He abruptly fell silent when he spotted Gideon in the rec room doorway. Lucas cleared his throat and mumbled, “No offense, boss.”
Gideon nodded. “None taken.” He glanced around the room. “Is there a problem?”
“Derek came home,” Garrett told him. “He said his date didn’t show. He seems pretty upset about it.”
“I see.” Gideon sighed. “Derek and I had a talk about the boy on our drive home yesterday. If he didn’t show up for the date, then maybe it’s best if Derek leaves well enough alone. You can’t mess around with a man’s faith or try and urge him to go against his beliefs. It will only cause more problems… and possibly cause him real harm.”
Lucas frowned, visibly annoyed. “Derek’s just supposed to give up on what could be his true love? And Patrick, too? You know the only reason Patrick stayed away tonight is because of some religious ideal that’s total bullshit.”
Gideon gazed at him, unfazed, unoffended. “It isn’t bullshit to Patrick. Even if what he believes isn’t true,hehas to be the one to come to that conclusion. And I believe, if he and Derek are truly meant to be, then he will.”
“So, Derek should literally donothing?”Lucas chuffed. “Just sit on his ass and wait for Patrick to beenlightened?”
Gideon shrugged. “Maybe so. Pushing Patrick to go against his beliefs certainly isn’t the way to handle it. That much I know. A man’s faith is verypersonal.Don’t underestimate someone’s love for God. It runs to the very depths of the soul. If they’re forced to make a choice—theywillchoose God. But God is not unjust. I disagree with Patrick’s beliefs in this matter, but I have been in his place and I know how strong and binding they can be. But maybe—justmaybe—God is using these circumstances to bring Patrick to a new understanding. Derek just needs to give Patrick space… and give God time.”
Dropping his pool stick on the table, Zachary sighed. “That’s all good and well, boss. And I’m sure you’re right. Butright now… our brother is up there in his room, heartbroken.” He moved away from the pool table. “And I think I know how to make him feel a little better.”
Garrett agreed—with GideonandZachary.
. . .
Derek lay flat on his back, arms stretched out across the bed, eyes on the dark ceiling. His final conversation with Patrick played over and over in his head. And that look on Patrick’s face… like he wanted to get away from Derek as quickly as possible.
You stupid fuck,Derek railed at himself. They were having a nice talk and Patrick had started to relax a little.Then you had to go and fuck it up.
