“It’ll be great,” Todd said. “Best friends back together again, having the time of our lives.” He sobered. “Like it was supposed to be all along.” He shook his head. “If my family hadn’t moved away… we would’ve gone through high school together, and then college. We wouldn’t have lost touch.” He released a short, humorless laugh. “Seems like so much time wasted.”
Katt hadn’t believed for a minute that Todd missed him these past years. He didn’t think that Todd had even given him a second thought. But all this time…
Todd stared at him until Katt shifted anxiously. Something in the silence put him on edge… unearthed memories he’d painstakingly buried.
“Look,” Todd said, breaking the heavy silence. “If you don’t want to join, it’s okay. No pressure. I just thought it might be a good way to get reacquainted. But it’s up to you.”
The thing was—Katt did want to be part of the fraternity, part of a brotherhood. Despite his circle of friends in high school, he’d still felt as if he were standing on the outside of everything and everyone. His plans to share the high school experience with his best friend had fallen through on the day they found the magazine and decided to “goof off.” By the endof summer and the beginning of school, he had lost his best friend… or thought he had.
“I do,” Katt rasped. “I… I do want to be part of it.”
“Awesome.” Todd smiled, and something flip-flopped in Katt’s gut. “Of course, I can’t just induct you into the brotherhood. Each would-be brother must earn their place.”
Katt swallowed. “How?”
“An initiation. I can get away with bypassing all the other stuff for you, but you still have to go through the initiation.”
“What is it?”
Todd’s smile stretched as he motioned to a chair. “Have a seat, and I’ll explain.”
His “explanation” had caught Katt off guard, big time. The cool, casual way Todd spoke about it—insisting they hadalldone it—had Katt reeling. There was no mention of their pastactivities, not even a hint of remembrance in the guy. Had he forgotten? Had he actuallyforgottenit had happened? Maybe the alcohol in his system had erased it from his memory completely.
Katt thought he had forgotten, too. But the instant Franco said Todd’s name, it all came rushing back. He couldn’t decide whether he feltrelievedthat Todd might not remember—orabandonedto live with the memory alone.
Why would you want him to remember? You don’t even want to remember.
The memory flash had taken only seconds as Marcus held his stare, awaiting his answer:Do you wanna try kissing?
There was only one answer. Katt swallowed hard—and nodded.
Marcus shifted excitedly. “I think you’ll like it.” He squinted. “It’s fun to kiss boys.” He inched closer. “You said you liked it back then.”
Katt had lied. Hadn’t he? So why had he felt so strange being alone with Todd again after all those years? Had he been afraid Todd would bring up the past? Or was he afraid Toddwouldn’t?
That made no sense; the last thing he’d wanted was for Todd to acknowledge what had happened between them in the fort, right?
Katt sat in numb silence, his eyes bulging in their sockets. “Wh-What?”
Leaning against the front of his desk, Todd loosely folded his arms across his chest and flashed a relaxed smile. “I told you, we all did it. Maybe not with porn stars, but still with guys.”
Katt pursed his lips. “You…?”
Todd nodded. “It’s no big deal.” He chuckled. “Not like it’s going to make you gay. It’s just sex. It doesn’t really hurt. And a porn star would know how to make it not hurt at all, probably.”
“Why…” Katt cleared his throat, shifting in the chair. “Why is this… the method of initiation… or whatever?”
Todd lowered his arms and gripped the edge of the desk, leaning forward a fraction. “Because any straight guy who would fuck another guy to be part of the brotherhood… it proves how badly they want to be a brother, and how loyal they’ll be to the brotherhood. And it provides a sharedsecret among us. Secrets like that forge unbreakable bonds. Our fraternity is the strongest, with the most loyal members because of it.”
Katt supposed he understood. The frat guys surely had their reputation among the college girls. No way in hell they’d want it known that they had fucked men to get into the fraternity.
Franco suddenly jumped to mind; he had fucked a guy, too? A sudden graphic image invaded Katt’s mind, and his stomach made that weird jump again. Only harder this time, which greatly disturbed him.
“If you change your mind,” Todd said. “You have to promise not to breathe a word of this to anyone.”
“I wouldn’t…” Katt shook his head. “I wouldn’t say anything.”
Nodding slowly, Todd smiled. “I know you wouldn’t.”
