The song becomes breathy and soft, a pair of lutes joining in a gentle harmony. Sparks fly from the slowing fire, rising up through the dark branches into the starlit sky. The air goes still and rare, dreamlike.
It feels as though there is no one else here but us.
My heart swells with emotion, tears springing to my eyes.
I have never felt more in love. I have never wanted anything this way; I have never known a need like this. Everything in me longs for him. Every part of me calls to him, needs him. I am utterly consumed by it, just as I knew I would be before we kissed for the first time.
I miss him so much. It’s killing me to see him this way, but I know I must bear it. I know he would do the same for me.
Please,I pray to Kerensa. I haven’t prayed to the goddess of love in a long time. I haven’t dared ask her for anything more than the gift she has already given me. But now, I’m desperate.
I need him back.
Please bring him back to me.
The song ends. I thank the man next to me, but my eyes never leave Ronan’s. Ronan stands, handing his lute to the woman next to him, his head tilting towards the woods.
I follow.
He leads me to a small grove between our camp and the Orsa, close enough to hear the music but far enough to not be heard.
He turns to me, and I realize I’m holding my breath. He looks so different now: his hair messy and swept back, his jaw lined with stubble. The veneer of godhood has been stripped back from him by travel or by trauma. He’s decidedly human, and somehow, it makes him more gorgeous than ever.
“Sylvie,” he whispers. He pulls me close to him, tilting my chin up to look at him. “Gods, I’m…Fuck. I don’t know what to say.” He shakes his head, enraged at himself. “I fucked it all up. I’m sorry.”
“You have nothing to apologize for,” I say, stroking his hair.
“I do. I pushed you away. I didn’t mean to. I just…”
I kiss his cheek, and he exhales, his breath warm on my skin. “It’s alright. I understand.” I love that he can see me now in the darkness, here in the woods at night. “I’m not going anywhere, Ronan.” His grip tightens on my waist. “I love you with everything that I am.Gods, how I love you. Now more than ever.”
“I know,” he says, his fingers grazing my jaw. “I can feel it. I’m just…I’m scared. I’m afraid you’ll see the worst in me, and you’ll hate me. Or you just won’t want me anymore, and that’s even worse. Now that I know what it’s like to have your love, I can’t imagine losing it.”
“You won’t lose me.” I mean that so deeply that I ought to be scared myself, but I’m not. I don’t think I have the capacity to be afraid of this anymore. All I have is a certain, perfect knowledge that we’re meant to be together. It feels like it has been written in the stars. Our destiny.
Fate.
There is a pull between us beyond anything I have ever experienced. Something beyond even the magic that we share, something that we’ve chosen, that we’ve opened ourselves to in spite of everything working against us.
I feel the moment it slides into place for him. His desire at the bonfire to open himself to me once more is fulfilled. He looks at me, and he knows, truly knows now, that I am his. I belong to him, hopelessly, irrevocably.
And he belongs to me.
“I’m yours, Ronan. Always. No matter what.” I hold his hand to my heart.
He tilts his head and shakes it, closing his eyes. “I don’t deserve you.”
I grab his jaw and force him to look at me again. “I’myours, Ronan.”
His brows pinch tightly together, part of him still fighting his feelings of despair.
“Tell me you aren’t mine,” I dare him.
His breath catches. He knows he can’t.
I wait for a long moment, the air still and quiet. Then he takes my other hand and mirrors my gesture, pressing it to his heart. “I’m yours, Sylvie,” he whispers. “If you’ll have me.”
I lean forward and press my lips to his gently. He exhales as the tension releases, and then he takes my face in his hands, deepening the kiss.
