“I mean this in the kindest way possible,” Hunter starts, holding his hands up in a sign of innocence, “but what else did you guys expect? Your whole relationship was playing with fireand praying you wouldn’t get busted. You both knew her job was at risk if you were caught…” He trails off when I turn my head to glare at him.
“This coming from the man in love with his childhood best friend, but who’s too chickenshit to tell her,” I snap.
He matches my glare before he rises from his spot on the floor and walks right out the back door.
Fuck. I shouldn’t have said that. It was a low blow but I’m feeling sensitive after this morning, and he’s hit a nerve.
“Fletch…” Austin says, voice uneven and hesitant. He wants to pull me out of whatever hole has turned me into a raging asshole but doesn’t want to be on the receiving end of my ire.
“I know, I know. That was uncalled for. I’ll talk to him,” I say, dragging my ass up off the couch and following him outside.
I find him at the edge of the patio, leaning against the fence and looking out over the ocean.
I mirror his position and blow out a defeated breath. “Hunt, I’m sorry.”
He doesn’t say anything for a while, but shrugs so I know he heard me. We’re both silent as we watch the waves crash over the beach and people watch.
“I’ve tried,” he finally says.
“Tried what?”
“To tell her. Fuck, I’ve almost said it so many times.” He sighs, taking a deep sip of his drink. “But she’s got a boyfriend right now. They even fuckinglive together.Plus, I was always friends with her brother too. I know he would have some choice words to say if he found out how I felt about his little sister.”
“Listen, I’m just dealing with my own shit and lashing out. I didn’t mean to poke at your own wounds.” I clap a hand down on his shoulder. “But at least not saying it is better than what I did.”
He eyes me warily. “Oh, no. What did you do?”
“Confessed I loved her as she was breaking things off.”
He sucks in a breath through his teeth. “Oh, Fletch, no.”
I rub the back of my neck. “Yeah, not my finest moment. Who knows though, maybe everything with Emily will work out as it should,” I suggest, returning the subject back to Hunter’s situation.
He huffs out a sad laugh. “Maybe.”
“Or, maybe you’ll meet your soulmate,” I say with a shrug.
“Doubtful.”
Cooper upheldhis promise and cut us all off at his imposed limits. I wish I could have another beer and fully drown my sorrows, but he’s right. I probably shouldn’t have even had the first two with the concussion, but two is better than nothing.
“So, what’s your plan now?” Austin asks as we dig into the Chinese takeout we had delivered—another thing that isn’t on our list of approved pre-game sustenance, but what Coach doesn’t know won’t kill him.
“What do you mean?” I ask around a bite of my egg roll.
“Are you guys done for good? Are you going to try to grovel for her? Girls love that groveling shit,” he says.
I sigh, dropping my fork down. “I don’t know.”
“Are you even going to try to get her back?” Hunter asks.
“I don’t know,” I say, tugging at my hair. “I think I need to give her some time to cool off and then we’ll see where things go from there.”
“How much time?”
I rub my index fingers in circles over my temples. “I don’t know. God, you’re giving me a headache with this interrogation.” I push back abruptly from the table. “I’m going to bed,” I say,leaving them and climbing the stairs to my bedroom. I feel bad leaving them to clean up dinner, but I also need to just sit in a dark room and get away from the questions.
I truly don’t know what I’m going to do. I’m going to give her the time she needs, but from there I don’t know what will happen. She’s the one who broke us up. The ball is in her court to reach out. If I reach out before she’s ready, she’s just stubborn enough that I’d probably lose her forever. I still can’t believe what a complete idiot I was. Last night, getting us caught. This morning when I told her I loved her for the first time.
